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How To Process This…

26 Oct

I think up things to post about all throughout the day – when something interesting happens or I have a particularly inspiring idea (that second one doesn’t happen too often, lol) I think about how I can turn it in to a post and share it. When I am at work, exercising, hanging out with people, surfing online recipes, reading health/diet books – whatever, if I think it can relate here and amuse, entertain, inspire or teach I think about how to post it. I’d say about 95% of these idea never ever even make it near a post, lol, not cause I decide to not share them but because when I sit down to type I forget what I was gonna write about, hehe, great attention span huh?

Sooooo, the whole reason behind that paragraph is because earlier today something happened that really pissed me off – I mean totally and completely pissed me off so badly my post was going to be a rant about how much I hate people and wish I could live the life of a rich hermit, if I could find a way to never have to leave my  house or interact in person with others but still make enough money to live comfortable I would do it…if only I had some mad hacker skills lol.  But then something else happened when I got home that was even worse then what happened earlier…a total and complete suck-fest that I have no power to fix. sigh.

I got a text from a friend at work that after certain people had left (not me, three other people) a staff meeting was called for all those still there to let them know that three specific people have been let go due to budget cuts and their last day will be friday…say wha?!?! We are making record profits! And yeah, two of them are new and not picking up the job all that quickly but the third has been here since…well, for ages! And she does a great job, a specialized job that others are now going to have to do (read – I am going to have to do, sigh) and she is my friend! We sit beside each other, we talk during the day, she’s my main supporter with weight watchers, she makes my work day enjoyable. And as of Monday that will all be gone. 😦

It’s probably wrong and twisted that I keep thinking how I will be affected, but hey, I am self involved over here so whatever! I mean, yeah, I did think about her and how it’s gonna affect her family, I started hoping she gets something new asap and really hoping we don’t lose touch but…I am also thinking how I will be kinda lonely at work, how her absence will affect my work load and “happy factor” at work. We bitch to each other, and help each other, support each other, cover for each other…we do lot’s for and with each other and now she’ll be gone…*sniffle* And who the fuck am I gonna excitedly tell my weight loss amount to every monday?! She was sooooo encouraging during that stupid 4 week plateau, I don’t think I would have made it through without her…I don’t wanna lose her! Now I am just whining…sorry. 😦

So, that text convo (which I am still having btw lol) totally threw me off my stride. Bad news coming out of the blue like that, I wasn’t sure how to deal with it. I instinctively wanted to get something to eat, lol, stupid right? I did eat, hello the plan isn’t to starve myself lol, but I ate my points and no more. However, I did not exercise even though it is tuesday. I know! I am breaking my exercise on tuesday and thursday plan but hey, I was involved in too important of a text convo to go out hiking in the rain…which oh yeah, rain season has started for sure – it’s raining everyday and not little dribbles but full out pouring rain so even if the text convo hadn’t happened I wouldn’t have gone out for the hike. 😛

I am gonna hafta find a new activity…it was one thing to force myself to go out hiking, somehow I managed to do that, but I haven’t been able to force myself to use the exercise bike or Wii Fit, which is stupid cause the Wii Fit is way fun and I like being able to bike while watching tv. I think what it is that’s stopping me (besides laziness) is the bike and Wii are in the living room so using them means I have a good chance of having an audience cause of the roomie. Thing is, I can’t use the Wii without taking over the tv so if she wants to watch something and I am using the Wii fit it’s a dilemna and if she wants to watch tv do you really think she’s gonna wanna hear me huffing and puffing on the bike? Highly doubt she will since I wouldn’t want to hear her and roomie #2 drove me frickin nuts when she’d come back from a run and stretch out all over the living room floor…like I want to see that? ugh.  All of this means I am going to have to find something to sign up for that is twice a week or more and in my price range which is like zero to nothing, lol, and fun. Not too hard of a list right? Ha! 😛

Today I ate:

29 grams Special K Vanilla Almond = 2 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

1 small banana = 1 point

1 serving weight watchers soup = 0 points

2 triangles light laughing cow cheese = 1 point

1 english muffin = 3 points

1 Activia = 2 points

raw mixed vegg = 0 points

1 prawn salad roll = 3 points

85 grams Eating Right whole wheat pasta = 5 points

1/4 cup Alfredo Roasted Tomato sauce = 2 points

mixed cook vegg = 0 points

2 Lifestyle Choices shortbread cookies = 2 points

Total points eaten 22.

So, I am kinda stressed cause until I hear from the boss man that I am not being cut I will be wondering, sigh. As we all know stress is a bad thing to have when trying to lose weight, it can cause your body to hold on to the weight instead of releasing it to the universe – and yes, that is how I have decided to look at it for now. lol. Plus there is the general sucky-ness of knowing my friend won’t have a job as of friday 4:30pm, sigh. Why does life have to be like this? sigh.

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