Abnormal Sleeping

25 Oct

Once upon a time, when I was a wee little babe who still slept in a crib my mom would put me down for a nap or for the night and apparently I’d conk right out. Soon as I was laying down I was unconscious. Wasn’t I such a nice baby? 😉 lol

For as long as I can remember I have been a night owl – a condition I feel is not given enough respect in our society lol. I know when you’re a kid it’s your parents’ responsibility to give you a bedtime and make you obey it, and really, how is a parent supposed to tell the difference between a kid who just wants to be a brat and not go to bed and a kid who is destined to be a night owl?

So, as a child I often pushed the boundaries of my bedtime, trying anything I could think of to stay up late and when I couldn’t draw out the actual going to bed process any longer I’d lay in bed bored out of my skull wide awake with nothing to do. I’m sure 9 times out of 10 I fell asleep because of sheer boredom lol.

Well now here I am, an adult, and I seem to have completely lost the ability to get to sleep at anything approaching a “normal” hour. Although what is “normal” is sooooo up for debate 😛 But even I think it is getting out of control, and if I think that then you know that means I am having sleeping issues. Which, is so sad cause sleeping is one of my absolute fave activities evah!

Yeah, you heard that right, I looooove sleeping! I love my bed, my pillows, my blankets, I love curling up in bed with a book, I love slowly waking up and being more aware of how comfy I am as I turn over and burrow farther under my blankets and pillows lol, I especially love my dreams…which may sound weird but let me explain! My dreams are like stories, seriously, they have a storyline, a plot, they play out in my head like a tv show or movie except instead of watching what someone else created I am watching what my brain comes up with. 🙂 So much better!

For the past couple weeks or so though I can’t get to sleep. I usually go to sleep anywhere between midnight and 3am, depending on what I did that day, how early I was up, when I have to be up the next day, all kinds of stuff. But lately? Just not happening. I have still been going to bed somewhere in that time frame, usually closer to the 3am then the midnight lol, but all I do is lay in bed, bored, tossing and turning. I lay awake for so many hours I actually start to feel hungry! It’s way harder to get to sleep when you’re hungry…I decided to stay up packing one of those evenings, thought maybe if I wore myself out I’d actually get to sleep when I went to bed so I didn’t go to bed till 4am and all that accomplished was me not managing to fall asleep until about 7am or so, sigh. And last night! omg, sigh, went to bed at 3am, tossed, turned, did that thing where you know you must be dozing off every now and then but for the most part you’re well aware of the passage of time, was still tossing at 6am, eventually go to a pathetic version of sleep, woke up full an proper at 9am, then and only then did I manage to drop into a deep sleep which lasted all the way till 10:45am when my alarm went off. *groan*

I miss my long, deep, dream filled sleeps. 😦

And of course, because I’m not getting to sleep until stupidly late I (if my alarm isn’t set) sleep in until stupidly late in the day thereby screwing up my days schedule. erg. Suckfest.

I keep toying with the idea of taking a sleeping pill, popping it at like 10pm so I’d be asleep by what 11pm or so? (I’m not sure how quickly those things kick in) but I’m reluctant to regulate my sleeping with medication, there must be a better way!…what it is though I am in the dark about lol

Oh, and can I say, what pisses me off even more then missing out on my dreams is the knowledge that without regular proper sleep your body stops losing weight and will sometimes even gain weight – gain! Double suckfest.


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