Archive | September, 2011

My First Food Was: Banana

29 Sep

Now, I don’t mean my first food when I was a wee little thing and finally getting to eat something solid cause that was probably something gross, like Pablum, ugh. 😛

What I mean was my first food that I ate yesterday. As those of you who read my last post know, I’ve been dealing with an unwelcome guest named Stomach Ulcer (bad ulcer bad! tsk tsk! *shakes finger*) Well, on Tuesday of this week I could finally go back to the doctor and get a new (and hopefully better) drug. When I told him how I was doing and how the drug I was currently on was doing absolutely nothing good for me we chatted a bit and then he wrote me a new prescription, yah! He also gave me 5 weeks of samples for the drug he just prescribed, so I can try them for 5 weeks without having to fill and pay for a prescription and then if in 5 weeks the drugs are fully kicked in and working I can fill the prescription but if they aren’t working I can go back to the doc and get the next level of drug without having to pay for drugs that don’t work…does that make sense? I feel like I rambled…

Yesterday was Wednesday and by the time I ate something I had taken two of the new pills – cause I take one at night and one in the morning. I actually felt…hungry! And not the gnawing growling pain my stomach had been feeling before that wasn’t really hunger but tricked me in to thinking it was hunger…this was real hunger, with hunger growls an everything! Haven’t had that in a while lol.

I decided to have a real breakfast – the anticipation for food, real food not Weetabix cereal, was intense lol. I fried one egg and one slice of tomato then put those and one cheese slice on a piece of toast, then I had a second piece of toast with 1/2 tbls whipped peanut butter and half a cut up banana on top. I figured if I was still hungry after all of that I’d eat the other half of the banana but when I was picking up my plate to take my food with me to the couch I couldn’t resist picking up the left over half of the banana. I ended up eating the banana first and omg it was soooooo good! I mean, bananas are good under normal circumstances but eating one after over a week of eating pretty much nothing but Weetabix cereal, it was like a flavour party in my mouth lol.

I just sat and savoured that banana 😀

Now, I started off with what I think of as a good choice for a first meal on the new meds. Simple, tasty, multiple food groups – and I ate it slowly keeping most of my senses focused inwards to my stomach just waiting to detect any pain or unhappy sensation so I could stop eating asap…is it a little sad that eating brings fear now? *thoughtful face* I am never one to take the totally safe route though, sigh, so I also had a cup of tea with me. I have had NO caffeine since this whole ulcer thing happened cause duuuude, caffeine+ulcer=massive pain! After I finished the food I started sipping the tea…at first it seemed ok and I was all ready to celebrate but before I was able to drink half the tea it happened…it started with some stomach clenching, a squeezing sensation, then bam! Pain! and the unhappy gurglings of a pissed off ulcer. Erg! stupid.stupid.stupid me. *rolls eyes* I immediately stopped the tea intake and swapped to a glass of milk and then some water lol. Can you say Damage Control? 😛

The rest of yesterday was a bust cause the pain from the tea didn’t really go away, it stayed low level but was always there. blerg. Because of that I ate stupidly lol. Those who have had ulcers know that a lot of people gain weight when they have an ulcer cause they tend to keep eating in an attempt to alleviate the pain but the food in the stomach is what is causing the pain…mean little cycle that. shrug. So, once the pain kicked in I kept wanting to eat, luckily (luckily?!) I’ve been dealing with this for over a week so I know eating will just make it hurt more sooooo I tried to be careful but really, I wasn’t lol.

Today I took a new approach. I started my day with the dreaded Weetabix cereal (yup, back to that again) but I topped it with cut up nectarine, yum! I only needed half of the nectarine cut up so I ate the other half after I finished the cereal. I made tea again, I can’t help it!, but with the awareness I probably wouldn’t get to drink even half of it, this time I stopped drinking before the pain could happen and I chased the tea with a glass of water so yah for me beating the ulcer! Yippee! lol.

I found that I was getting hungrier sooner then I normally would, after about 1.5 hrs or so instead of 3 but I think that’s cause (1) I’ve been half starved for over a week and my body is pissed and (2) I’m eating smaller amounts at a time so it’s not enough to keep me full for 3 hours. As a result I ended up having a snack of yogurt, then a meal of veggie soup with two pieces of bread with margarine on them and a Weight Watchers lemon cake thingy (fyi, the cake thing was way good!). Then I went to boxing, then I had half a fajita premade salad topped with half a cut up chicken breast. 🙂

All of that used up 19.5 points and I get 20 a day. I wanted something as a sweet but I’m much more aware of my stomach now and what it can handle and I knew eating a chocolate something or other would make it unhappy (sadness) so instead I made a cup of cocoa (which might seem weird but it’s made with milk so it’s actually quite soothing) and I had a package of Weight Watchers sourdough pretzels. I probably could have done without the pretzels but, well, I don’t have a good excuse for why I ate them…shrug, it’s me, I just ate them. lol.

So I’ve eaten 5.5 of the 7 exercise points I have earned…could’ve been worse I s’pose. 😛

Another happy thing (on par with being able to eat normal food again!) is that I have been able to exercise again, wOOt! I got to go to Dragon Boating this past monday and I boxed today! 😀 I can’t believe I am so happy I got to exercise but I am. lol. I only managed one boxing class last week and no dragon boating so it’s great that this week I got to go boating and boxing – and neither time did I end up doubled over in pain or feeling like I was gonna pass out (like last week’s boxing class) 😀

It seems I am fairly back to normal…kinda…I’m getting wicked heartburn late evenings, something I have never had before, but I’m hoping that goes away after I’ve been on the drugs a bit longer. I didn’t realize heartburn was so uncomfie, and I apologize for all the times I saw heartburn meds ads and scoffed at people who said they needed drugs for heartburn, it really is nasty and heartburn sufferers now have my total and complete sympathy…hmm, I just realized it’s 12:39am and no heartburn…maybe mine has gone away?? Oooooh, here’s hoping! *crosses fingers*crosses toes*crosses eyes…wait, that doesn’t work, I can’t do that lol 😛


My Ulcer and I

23 Sep

My ulcer and I are so tight I don’t do anything without it! ahahahaha, aren’t I just soooooo funny? 😛 If I could leave the stupid thing behind I would, duh, but unfortunately I’m stuck with the bastard. Grr. Maybe I should name it? Then I’d have a name to be thinking while I am thinking about how much I hate it. It’s good to focus your anger right?

This past week has been a suck fest cause my stomach has been a boiling volcanic hell *rolls eyes*. It’s all cause the BC healthcare made me switch my acid reflux pills to something that is cheaper but doesn’t work nearly as well. I have a freakishly acidic stomach so without medication to control it I get -drumroll please- Ulcers! Yah! Oh wait, that’s not a “yah!” moment, oops! 😉 lol

Because of the ulcers I missed dragon boating, and only managed to box once this week (and I had a wicked hard time at that training session). Why did I miss out on so much? Cause I spent a good chunk of time sitting on my couch trying to find any frickin position possible that would help minimize the pain (fyi, no position was any better then the others) and alternating between wanting to eat but being scared to and finally caving and eating but then being in so much pain from the combo of food+ulcer that I couldn’t focus on anything but the pain and even though it makes me a wimp, I’ll admit it, shedding some tears. Lame.

Ulcers suck big fat hairy toes. 😛

I have learned over the past week the only food I can sorta manage is Weetabix cereal, one piece of it, with 1/2 cup 1% milk…milk has become my best friend which is weird cause milk produces acid during digestion but somehow it helps when you have an ulcer…I’ve never understood why…

I had an inspiration yesterday though, maybe if whatever I ate was mooshed to the same consistency as what Weetabix cereal becomes once you add milk to it I might be able to eat it and not have too much pain – I’m so brilliant! kinda…lol. I mooshed up a banana and put some yogurt with it and ate that last night and it wasn’t so bad. So, I think my ulcer doesn’t like food that is in pieces it has to work to digest, and ok, I can deal with that, my tummy wants to be lazy, fine, I’ll accomodate. So today I ate a fried egg, cheese slice and slice of tomato on one piece of toast and chewed every single bite till it was mush in my mouth (yeah, it was as gross as it sounds lol) But! after I was done eating I didn’t have nearly as much pain as before so I am couting this as a win for me. 😀 Later I ate yet another piece of Weetabix with milk. lol.

Never in my life have I eaten so much Weetabix in one week nor have I drank so much milk in one week since, well, before Weight Watchers. I limit my milk intake cause I don’t like using my points on my drinks but since it helps my stomach I drink a glass of milk with everything I attempt to eat (except the Weetabix cause it’s already in milk). It really does help with the pain so for now you couldn’t get me to part with my milk if you pointed a gun at my head. 😛

I didn’t mean for this to be a whining post but I guess all I’ve done is bitch about the ulcer, sorry. Hopefully it will be better starting next Tuesday, that’s when I see the doctor again and hopefully get new and better pills *cross my fingers*

For now, I think I’ll go pour myself yet another glass of milk…

Brand Loyalty

17 Sep

How many of you have brand loyalty when grocery shopping? I’m sure all of you know what I mean by brand loyalty but just in case some of you don’t, my definition of it is when grocery shopping I pick certain brands first and some items I only buy in one specific brand.

I have a bunch of foods like this, for example, I only buy Heinz ketchup and Heinz baked beans. I prefer Maple Leaf for my meat, I also like Schneider’s, Kraft is a big one for me, Tetley for my tea and no other ever lol, I could go on as I recently realized there are a lot of foods that I pick from the grocery store shelf based on the brand name and not the price tag.

Where did this awareness come from? Well, I had to buy bread. Yup…this all started cause of buying bread lol. 😛 For I don’t even know how long now I have been eating Bodywise Bread, it is a Dempster’s product, you get two slices for one point and while I hated it when I first started eating it I managed to convince myself that it was just as good as “normal” bread and I wasn’t missing out on anything (like oh say, size, taste…). I got a bad loaf one time and I emailed Dempster’s to complain, I mean come on, at almost $4 a loaf I expect my bread to not have a huuuuuge hole going all the way through the loaf making each slice half the size it normally is – they agreed with me and mailed me a bunch of coupons, each one worth one free Dempster’s bread product, Yah! 😀

This meant that even when my money got way restricted and I was learning I had to be uber careful with how I spent it I could still get my Bodywise bread. Sadly, the coupons did eventually run out. I automatically switched to buying the Weight Watcher’s bread since they are basically the same thing, same size, same taste, same points, same price. It was just an automatic swap – I was thinking in weight watcher’s points, not dollars.

Well, couple weeks ago I had a very specific amount of money I could spend on groceries and I couldn’t justify spending so much money on one loaf of bread – really, when I thought about it, almost $4 for one loaf is ridiculous! I was in Wal-Mart so I went searching through all the other loafs having to actually “shop” for my bread as opposed to blindly picking it from the shelf…weird. I found that a lot of bread is around the same price range, but at least with the not-as-healthy-bread you’re getting a proper size and a better taste for your money…course you’re also getting a lot more calories and fat (and usually less fibre) which in our world equates to More Points. Suckfest.

In the end I chose the cheapest bread which was the Wal-Mart brand, there were two options, white or brown – so totally back to basics lol. It cost me a little over a dollar and is 3 Points for 2 slices – which is ridiculous (seems to be my word of choice this evening lol) but I have to be more concerned with my wallet then my waist when shopping nowadays. shrug. I chose the brown cause it had one more gram of fiber then the white, otherwise they were identical for nutritional information – I thought the extra fiber was a good choice even though I prefer white bread.

After the bread shopping, which lemme tell you, I was in the bread department going back and forth between the various loaves for a good 15 minutes lol, I started thinking more about the choices I was making. I didn’t have a lot to buy that day and the bread was my only deviation from my normal brand but it makes me wonder how much money I might of saved over the years if I had shopped based on price tag and not brand name?

Usually if there is something I want that is pricey I wait and buy it when it is on sale, most food items go on sale in a predictable manner so it’s not so bad, but with some items even when they are on sale the no-name brand is still cheaper…but are they just as good? This is where my brand loyalty rears it’s ugly head.

To me Heinz is always better, as is Kraft, Maple Leaf, Tetley and others. If I buy a can of no-name baked beans will they be as good as Heinz? Part of me thinks probably they would be, but part of me thinks nope. shrug. I am really not sure. Some brands I will never mess with or stray from, like Tetley, no way I would risk a change with my tea! lol But perhaps I will branch out of my comfort zone in the weeks  and months to come and try different and cheaper brands of the foods I like….maybe I will become less of a brand snob and more of a thrifty shopper – nuthin wrong with that! 😀

Paid To Act!

15 Sep

Today was a momentus occaision for me, Momentous! For the first time ever I got paid to act! Paid! To ACT!! wOOt! 😀 *happy dance*butt wiggle*

I am an actress, that is my official career title, but all the acting jobs I have had till now have been student projects or volunteer opportunities. Now, there is nothing wrong with those, everyone has to start somewhere and those opportunities all gave me valuable lessons but they don’t pay the bills. lol. Technically, neither does this one as I only earned $70, lol, but again, gotta start somewhere! 😀

I would love to be able to tell you watch a specific tv show on a specific date or watch a certain movie and there I will be but this video you most likely will never see…no, it wasn’t porn! Get your minds out of the gutters! lol. 😛 It was a Corporate Video, so, only people involved with that company will see it although apparently it might be put on youtube…I’m not sure if that is right though cause it doesn’t make sense to put it on there…

So $70 for 3 hours of work, well done I feel but better yet I have a video credit that I can put on my resume that is a “real” acting job. Student and unpaid projects don’t garner as much respect with agents, they kinda think meh when they see those, paid jobs however, totally different reaction – much better reaction! 😀

A part that feeds my ego even more is that I got this job all on my own, I don’t have an agent, none have signed me yet, so neener neener neener to all you agents who looked at me and said no cause ha! I am marketable and I can get work without you and a different agent will see that and realize I am a good bet and they will get all the commission from my bookings in the future. 😛

Ok, that was my little gloat, I’m back to being nice again. 🙂

On the note of my weight loss, I have been undereating for a couple weeks now cause of issues with the medication I am on. I’m not trying to not eat all my points it’s just that everything I eat and drink makes my stomach hurt so it kinda puts me off eating. shrug. I am trying though. I’m usually eating higher pointed but smaller amounts of food in the hopes that will make it all work out.  🙂

I have been managing to get my work outs in though, no worries about that! I’m still doing the dragon boating and the boxing. 🙂 The dragon boating season ends at the end of October and I’m not sure what I am going to do then…there is an Outrigger Team I could join, they train through to mid to end of January and there is a race involved, it’s $89 for 16 training sessions which is a really good deal but…I’m kind of a weather wimp and don’t know that I could deal with being out on the water during the winter…it’s nasty enough dragon boating in the evening if it happens to be raining but Outrigger Boating in actual winter time? in the evenings? …I dunno…seems…unpleasant…

I think it’d be a better idea to try to find something to do that is an indoor pursuit…I could try to find another Zumba class, that was fun…I think I’ll check out the Community League’s fall schedule and see what they have. Community Leagues are so great, you can try all sorts of new activities for cheaper then if you went through a gym or studio. 🙂

This past week has pretty much rocked! I had 2 auditions, got paid to act, got the passport application in, got paid to act, got a smile and a wink from a hottie McHottie fireman *drool*, got paid to act, met up with some friends I haven’t seen in a while for lunch…did I mention I got paid to act? 😉

Oh and on Sunday I have a photo shoot lined up, so I already have something to look forward to for next week, yah! 😀

How I Fill Out A Passport Application

13 Sep

Ok, this isn’t really about my weight loss or Weight Watchers journey but I was talking to my mom today and was telling her about how I went about getting my passport application done and she found it vastly entertaining so I thought I’d share it with you. It’s like a joke…except it’s real…and how I approach most things…I am uh, let’s say unique, that’s a non-judgy kind of word lol. 😀

Ok, so last week I printed off the passport application from the government website. If I had gotten off my ass ages ago I could have just filled out the Renewal Form but nope, not me! I waited and waited and now I have to completely reapply. *rolls eyes* I was so excited to get the application in (don’t ask me why…I’m weird about stuff like that lol) so I started filling it out right away. I decided to show a bit of my personality on the form – I mean, those forms are so boring and I figure the employees who process them must get so bored looking at the same thing over and over that why not make mine a bit more fun to look at? shrug. My way of making it show a bit of “me” in the form was to use a pretty ink colour. It’s a very nice turquoise colour. 🙂 I picked it cause important forms should have black or blue ink but I read (in a fiction book that has an almost complete cast of characters who are vampires…but that’s neither here nor there…) that all legal forms should have blue ink never black and sure, this isn’t technically a legal form but I’m filling it out and then signing to confirm I’m not lying right? So, kinda legal…in a way…so I thought I should use blue ink and well, turquoise is a shade of blue, so that should be ok, right? 😀

I was filling out my form and started to get bored so I stopped part way through. I used the excuse that I needed to confirm with various friends who will be my Guarantor and who will be my 2 References and I might as well wait to finish the rest of the form. So of course I texted friends and left it at that. 😛 This past Saturday I went for my photo only because I was having a good hair and makeup day, otherwise I probably would have put that off a bit also…there is always the hope if I wait another day I’ll look better in the picture then if I took the pic today, right?  😉

Anyways! I got two friends who agreed to be my references and one who agreed to be my guarantor, yah! I met up with KL for an early lunch today so she could fill out her section of the form (she’s my guarantor) and last night when I was making sure the papers were in my purse I thought “I should take a quick look at them, see if anything is missing or if I need anything special” but then I poo-poo’d that idea as just silly and nitpicky and assured myself it was all good. While KL was filling out her section of the form (with my snazzy turquoise pen) she said “I don’t know my passport number”…uh, say what? Yeah, turns out she needs some info from her passport but I didn’t know this cause I didn’t check the form the night before did I? *rolls eyes* KL calls her bf who is at home but he doesn’t believe in answering his phone, or keeping it charged, or taking it with him when he goes out (annoying!) so she just keeps calling and calling…and calling…sigh.

KL had to go back to work so I wandered downtown killing time waiting to see if she gets a call back from her bf and saw oh so many things I wanted to buy but being broke I bought nothing, sadness. She actually got a call from him and got the info so she texted it to me and I go to fill out the form by leaning the paper against the side of the London Drugs but the (snazzy turquoise) pen didn’t like writing at an angle and it stopped working. Meh, no biggy, figured I’d go to the passport office, find a table and fill it in there But! while shuffling the papers to confirm the address I see a couple not completed sections, oops!

I was supposed to fill in my work info but I didn’t cause I needed the address and phone number and exact dates of when I started and when/if I stopped working there…do you think I had that info while wandering downtown with a cell phone that can only go on to social networking sites and not google? Why no, no I didn’t. I decided I’d go to the passport office, find a table, sit and call my parents, lol, parents fix everything! I thought one of them could pull up my tax stuff to get the dates of employment and one of them could go google the addresses and numbers – easy peasy right?

When I got to the office I had a brainstorm! I could old school it and see if they had a phone book, then I could get the addresses and numbers all on my own…course, I kinda suck at understanding/using phone books but hey, desperate times desperate measures. shrug. When I asked the security guard she said if I go up two more floors there is a Service Canada Office and they have ten computers for public use and I could use one of them…I think she thought I wouldn’t be able to use the phone book, oh how right she was! lol. So up I went, found a computer and got the info I needed. Yah! I was also able to log in to my government account and see my ROE for the job I got laid off from which gave me the job info for that one and the other job I figured I knew the info decently well enough.

While filling out the addresses I decided I’d actually read the instructions for that section again, sigh, turns out I thought it said “fill in the info from your last two jobs”, it actually said “fill out the info from your last 2 years of work” – uh, two totally different things, and that would explain why there were three lines available for the info…I was wondering why if they only wanted the last 2 jobs there were 3 lines *confused face* Well, they were gonna hafta make do with the last two jobs for info cause that’s all I had. lol 😛

I also saw that I hadn’t filled in the references section, heh, but my pen was working again and my friend’s info is stored in my phone so that wasn’t too hard to take care of.

After all of that I go back to the passport office and go to the first line up I need…the person takes a look at your form checking for glaringly obvious screw ups then assigns you a number, oh, and she collects your ID and stuff, puts everything into a plastic bag (like a ziploc bag but no brand name on it) so you don’t lose any of your stuff while sitting and waiting. There I am, thinking phew it’s all but done now and she says “while you’re waiting I need you to go over to that desk in the back and go over everything on your form with a black pen because I think the ink colour is too light to be picked up by the scanner” What?! My pretty turquoise ink?! Covered?? No more personality for me…and ya know, I don’t think she even appreciated the colour! *shocked*

Well, what else could I do, I wrote over everything in black ink, boring, then waited, in a highly air conditioned room while wearing a short sleeved tshirt and no book. That’s right, I forgot my book! Man was I bored! Score for me though is that the distressingly long line ahead of me moved rather quickly and I didn’t have to wait too too long…I played games on my phone and texted with peeps to pass the time. 🙂 (side note, is it sad I can’t sit and patiently wait for something for longer then 5 minutes without needing some sort of entertainment?…were people more patient in the past or was it just that they didn’t have cell phones and mp3 players and handheld game devices to keep them entertained so they just had to suck it up and wait?)

When I got called up I got the nicest lady, she worked crazy fast, went through the form, asked me some questions, did who knows what on her computer, gave me back my ID then told me the wait time to process the passport is 2 weeks and when it is ready they will priority mail it to me and is that ok? Ok? Dude, that’s awesome! Only 2 weeks and they’ll send it to me so I don’t have to get my lazy butt all the way back downtown to pick it up?! Super Great! 😀 I thought it was gonna take a long time to get my passport and that I’d have to go back for it so this was quite the pleasant surprise. I told her that and she seemed a little surprised I thought the 2 weeks and mailing to me thing were great…how could it not be?

So there we have it, that is how I filled out my passport application…it only took me about 1.5 weeks to get it done! lol. 😀 If I was my brother he would have filled out the form perfectly first try (and in record time) and submitted it all in the same day…but I like my way better, cause this way I have a story to tell! 😀 His life may be awesome in all the ways society judges these things, but I think mine might have more funny stories. 😀

I’ve Been Down

8 Sep

So I’ve been a bit down in the dumps this week, which is part of the reason why I haven’t been posting – nobody wants to read unhappy posts right?

There is a saying about how you are never given more than you can handle…personally I think that’s one of the stupidest things I have ever heard. Of course we at some points in our life have more things than we can handle, but since we don’t have an option about handling everything that’s on our plates we just have to suck it up and keep going. The only other option would be to, well, either die or go crazy…neither of which are good options. The first one kinda sucks cause then everything is over (even the good stuff) and the second will leave you branded for life in a very negative way…it does not pay in today’s society to be branded crazy in any way cause that’ll follow you for life.

So what do we do when we have too much to deal with but still have to keep going? Well, I think a lot of the time some things will slide a bit and maybe you’ll drop the ball on some of the smaller things, but eventually you are able to catch up and get a handle on what is still on your list.

My list of things I am dealing with was just too much and this week sucked cause of it. I’m dealing with the new medication that isn’t working well so I’ve been sick everyday, I still don’t have a new roomie so now I’m trying to find somewhere I can move to that I can actually afford but that isn’t happening cause I’m stupidly poor, I had to borrow money from my parents which I hate having to do (you’d think by now I’d be able to take care of myself but nooOOooo not me, sigh), I’m having side effects from the new medication so on top of being sick I’m dealing with a host of new and not so lovely symptoms, the agent I met with last week decided not to sign me so I still don’t have an agent and at this point I don’t even have one whose thinking about signing me, I’m supposed to be memorizing lines for an audition I have on saturday but I’m having trouble reading due to one of the side effects from my meds (I’m way nauseous and reading makes me feel even worse), and basically, I am stressed.

Nice list huh? I know there are people out there with worse lists than me, and I know I am being a whiny git but come on already! Like it wasn’t bad enough when I was stressing about not having an agent, not having any money, not having a roomie and not being able to find a place I can afford on my own now I get to add all these stupid medical problems on top of it? I was doing ok with my list of crap ass things I had to deal with until the medical stuff got piled on top, that was the final straw that took me from stressing-but-dealing-with-it-and-keeping-a-good-mood to stressing-and-can’t-deal-and-wanting-to-give-up girl. I don’t like being the give-up-girl but some days I just have nothing to give to the world. sigh.

I don’t know how people with chronic medical problems deal with life, as soon as my meds get screwed with and I’m as sick as I would be everyday if I didn’t have my meds even the smallest thing in life becomes too much to deal with. I can’t eat cause everything (literally everything) makes me sick, I can’t sleep cause lying down makes me sick, I’m exhausted, hungry, nauseous, light-headed, dizzy and short-tempered all cause my drug plan is making me try these other pills. I still have like 3 weeks of this ahead of me, 3 weeks! Boxing almost killed me yesterday and today, I thought I was gonna hafta run out of the room yesterday and throw up cause all the motion made my stomach even worse, arg! I refused to leave though, I don’t want to make concessions to my stomach more than I already have. But because of that I totally ended up under-eating yesterday cause when I got home I was so not able to eat. Today was a bit better, we weren’t going up and down so much in class this evening so when I got home I was able to eat but I’m still 5 points away from hitting my daily points and I honestly don’t know if I can eat anything else, my stomach just can’t handle the food.

Maybe this is why I was so much slimmer when I was younger, not cause I was always working or out with friends but because I didn’t eat enough cause my stomach wouldn’t let me…hmm…not the best diet plan in the world but I guess there are worse ways to go lol 😉

So despite all the bitching I have done in this post I am actually a bit better today, I’m getting more used to the sick feeling so I’m getting better at handling it. I’m hoping I’ll actually be able to sleep tonight cause of exercising yesterday and today – I’m hoping I wore myself out enough I won’t wake up cause I am feeling sick lol. I’m going to stop whining about not having an agent and go apply to the next wave of the ones I short listed (I applied to the ones that take electronic submissions first cause it wouldn’t cost me money to email them all my stuff, now I am applying to the agencies that take paper submissions only – the post office will soon be my best friend lol) and I am going to continue to hunt for a roomie and/or a new place to live that I can afford on my own.

It’s not the best list, cause except for the agent hunting, it’s fairly non-specific, but right now it’s the best I can do cause I gotta sign off and go memorize some lines!  🙂

Yogurt Overboard!

3 Sep

Aaahhhhh! I lost a yogurt! Crap! 😦

I didn’t lose it in the normal way of ‘it went bad and I had to throw it out’, I had a nannying job yesterday and I took a yogurt with me in case I needed a snack and guess what I forgot in the fridge there when I left? Yup, my yogurt. sigh. I feel like a Marine who failed in their motto of never leaving a man behind…is that Marines? lol. Who knows. 😛

I was about ten minutes away from the house when I realized I left it behind, I almost went back but if I had rang the doorbell I would have woken the sleeping baby and that would have been bad soooooo I just kept driving…with a tad of swearing interjected lol

Today was a weigh in day, for the past couple days I have been feeling thinner, not like ridiculously thinner or anything but just, thinner and a bit more content with my tummy area – which is a nice change. 🙂 I wasn’t even all that worried when I stepped on the scale, I was hoping really strongly the number would be lower then last weigh in day but there was no fear involved like there normally is. And what do ya know, I was down a pound! YAH!

You may be thinking meh, whatever, it’s just a pound, but I usually lose a bit under a pound at a time and I have been struggling with this plateau for-frickin-ever so finally losing an entire pound in one week is soooooo nice. 😀

I worked really hard this past week to eat my daily points and only my daily points. Some days I did eat some of my exercise points but never all of them. I didn’t exercise thursday and friday cause boxerfit was cancelled due to the long weekend and somehow I didn’t make it outside for a hike or even manage to pop in an exercise dvd, I know I should have found the time but I figured if I was just extra careful points wise those days it’d be ok. Looks like I was right! 🙂

I decided to treat myself for losing an entire pound, you’ll never believe how I treated myself, it’s kinda weird…I went for a hike. *rolls eyes* lol. I know! I do that all the frickin time right? How is that a treat? Well, it kinda isn’t, I mean, I took the same route as normal, dressed the same, kept the same pace…it wasn’t a treat as in I tried something new or did something I never get to do, it was a treat as in I’ve been working really hard, I lost one more pound of my fat and I am going to celebrate by being physically active. 🙂 So, the physicality of the hike was what the treat was, cause a year ago, hiking that trail would have been a lot harder!

Something else happened this evening, after I was home from doing some errands I decided to go for a walk to 7-11, I wanted a pop. shrug. No biggy right? Well, my neighbourhood is made up of a lot of hills, it’s kinda torture walking around here, you can end up getting a good workout that’ll make you sweat without even trying lol. Anyways, I walked to the store, bought a pop, then walked a longer way home, just sorta meandered a bit. It was only an hour long walk, I left here at 9p and got back a bit after 10p but at one point I realized that I was walking at a decent pace, keeping that pace steady, even when I was going uphill…I wasn’t out of breath, getting flushed, struggling…I was just peachy keen fine…weird. I liked it!

It was the first time I did something and was really aware that if it had been a year ago that same activity would have caused shortness of breath, sweating, muscle strain and it just wouldn’t have been fun. But this time, it was just relaxing and fun. 😀

I still have a ways to go with losing weight, then there will be all the toning etc that I will have to work on but today and tonight made me feel really good about myself…I am getting smaller numbers on the scale, I am seeing a difference in how I look in the mirror, I am feeling a difference in my body image and best of all I am noticing a difference in how well my body can handle various physical activities. I can’t wait to go hiking again tomorrow! 😀

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