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Conversations With…Myself?

21 Oct

Do you ever talk to yourself? I’m sure you do…I think we probably all do at some point. I have conversations with myself all the time – don’t worry, I am not that crazy person who talks out loud on the bus, lol, the convos are all in my head. Oh, and it’s not like I am running some commentary about everything I see and experience, the convos all have a point and are to help me decide on a course of action or figure out how to do something…you know, they have a purpose. lol. 😛

So, here is how my convo went today when I was on the way home from work:

Me: I can’t wait to get home and sit on the couch, I am so frickin tired.

Me: You have to exercise first, don’t forget!

Me: I don’t wanna! *stomps foot*pouts*

Me: Don’t you want to get skinny? You’re never going to get an agent if you don’t lose weight. *glares*

Me: Well…yeah, I wanna lose weight but…I am tired, and I think it’s raining, I can’t go hiking in the rain…

Me: Who cares if it rains, go out anyways!

Me: Hmmm, no, my hair will go frizzy and it’s cold and it’s already getting dark…and look at those clouds, it’s gonna pour.

Me: And who is going to see you and your frizzy hair? Nobody!

Me: Ok, listen, my hair isn’t the point. I have errands to do and I am hungry and I’ve been cold and tired all day and I have laundry and whenever I go hiking I don’t get to finish my laundry until way late and I want to go to bed early.

Me: Do your laundry another time, eesh.

Me: Dude, you’re in my head, you know I have specific laundry days and this is one of them!

Me:  If you don’t lose weight this week you know you’re gonna be pissed at yourself…so don’t blame me!

Me: Whatever. I am ignoring you now and going home to eat carbs. 😛

Aaaaahhh, a glimpse in to my head, enjoy yourself? lol. So, I continued to ignore that voice in my head and made myself a nice big plate of whole wheat pasta with some mixed vegg thrown in and topped with an alfredo sun dried tomato sauce, it was gooooood! Totally worth the points. 😀

Today was just a “day” ya know? I woke up hungry and stayed hungry all day, ugh, I hate that! On top of the hunger I was tired and cold and I kept walking in to walls, what’s with that?!?! So I decided that yes, exercise is good, but getting a proper nights sleep (something I haven’t managed to do all frickin week!) is better for me at this point, so no hike tonight. Instead it’s been an evening of pasta, laundry and phone calls…oh, and of course writing this blog. 😛

Today I ate:

29 grams Special K Vanilla Almond = 2 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

1 small banana = 1 point

1 Activia = 2 points

1 Amy’s Indian Mattar Paneer = 6 points

1 piece toast = 1 point

2 triangles light laughing cow = 1 point

mixed raw veggies = 0 points

85 grams whole wheat spaghetti = 5 points

1/4 cup Classico alfredo and sundried tomato sauce = 2 points

mixed cooked veggies = 0 points

1 shortbread cookie = 1 point

1 Thinsations Fudge Dipped Bar = 1 point

Total points eaten 23.

Now I know I usually try to not eat my flex points but considering how hungry I have felt all day I am impressed I didn’t go farther over my daily 22 points. Oy! All I wanted to do today was eat and/or sleep. lol. If I could have slept while eating I would have! I am feeling so hungry because I am so tired, I know this, when thinking rationally I am aware of this and that is how I managed to not over eat while at work  but still…once I got home all I could think was “carbs!” and “bed!” I gotta get more sleep cause I don’t wanna go through another “hungry day” just cause I am tired, that’s just not cool man, not cool.

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