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Annoyed By Consciousness

20 Sep

I find that if I don’t have somewhere I absolutely have to be on a Friday I sleep in, and it is glorious. I actually try to give myself one day a week where I don’t check my messages, or email, or go on social media, and I just sleep in and be lazy all day. Having that day off from the world helps me function better during the other 6 days of the week. However, sometimes I take that day of rest a tad too far.

This past Friday I slept in, to be fair I didn’t go to bed until around 4am, but still, I slept in. When I woke and saw it was around 1pm I briefly thought I should get up, but I was so incredibly exhausted I rolled over and went back to sleep. The cat, who was sleeping on the bed, also rolled over and went back to sleep. We are in sync like that lol.

The next time I woke up dusk was approaching. Yes, you read that right, I slept through all the daylight hours. It was about 4:45pm, dusk comes early now.

Even though I still felt tired I figured I should probably get up, sigh. As I got up so did the cat, though he didn’t look impressed to be awake. We went to the kitchen, I got Striker food and water, turned on the kettle, went to the washroom, and when I got out of the washroom Striker was sitting waiting for me. As soon as he saw me he meowed then walked in to the bedroom. I followed him of course, I am nothing if not well trained.

What does Striker do when he gets in to the bedroom? Jumps on the bed, lays down, and looks ready to go back to sleep!

Not gonna lie, I wanted to curl up with him for a cuddle but felt that if I did that I’d never end up getting dressed and being upright for any decent length of time that day. So I told him no, I had to stay up and get dressed. He looked completely unimpressed by my getting dressed instead of laying back down. But then again, he often looks unimpressed by things I do.

I went back to the kitchen, made tea and a bite to eat, then settled on the living room chair. Striker came out of the bedroom gave me a dirty look, then jumped on my lap, stretched out, and went back to sleep.

Apparently sleep was the only acceptable activity he approved of for the day and I ruined things by waking up and getting up.

I guess I’m not that well trained after all.

He spent the rest of the day, or should I say evening and night, randomly waking up to glare at me before rolling back over to sleep.

Normally I would wonder what the hell I was doing sleeping an entire day away but these are not normal times and I figure if after a long week at work with a lot of emotional ups and downs my body decides it wants to deal with that by being unconscious for a long time, well, I’m gonna let it. Sometimes we heal by activity, or by motion, or by being with others, and other times we heal by having solitude, and sleep, and giving ourselves permission to not be productive for a while. You do what you need to do, I will do what I need to do, and lets have the only ones judging us be our pets, we know they are doing it anyways! 😉

Blep!
Pretending he didn’t blep.

Pandemic Diet Tip

16 Sep

I was out walking on a trail near where I live the other day and started contemplating what I was going to have for dinner. My options were something from my kitchen, that I had already paid for and was the logical choice, or once off the trail head over to where there are a bunch of restaurants and pick something up.

Because buying food when I already have food at home is the less brilliant choice I of course went with that one. *rolls eyes*

However, as I was leaving the trail and getting back in to the neighbourhood I started thinking about the logistics of going to buy something.

First, do I have money, or something I can tap?

Second, has my face gone so bright red from working out I look like I may pass out?

Third, where do I want to go?

Four, am I forgetting anything?

My answers started off just fine. I had my phone which I could tap to pay. I took a look using my camera and my face wasn’t so incredibly red I didn’t want to be seen in public. I still had walking time to choose between my food options.

And then it hit me…my mask. Because I had gone out to a trail that is not overly populated, was not going to be gasping for breath thanks to my decision to not run during the poor air quality day that it was, and I was intending to go home soon as I was done, I had not taken my mask.

Well crap.

I take my mask everywhere. I choose to not go in to stores if I don’t have my mask on, whether or not the store has a sign about needing to wear a mask in order to enter or not. And there I was, without my mask.

Now maybe, maaaaaybe, I might’ve gone in somewhere without my mask on if I got there and nobody else was inside but! you never know which stores will have a sign up saying a mask is mandatory and I am just that lazy that I am not going to risk walking all the way to where the restaurants are and then not be allowed in because my mask was at home.

So there you have it, my first diet tip of the pandemic, forget your mask so you can’t follow the impulse to buy dinner instead of going home and making something healthier…that you already paid for…really, it is a bit of a financial tip also if you think about it lol.

Pandemic Buying

6 Aug

Admit it, you bought something during the pandemic that you look at now and go “what was I thinking?”

For me that item is a Dutch Oven. I bought it when everyone was baking bread and I thought I might want to try. All the easy bread recipes I found said you had to use a Dutch oven, which of course I didn’t own. Because why would I?

Canadian Tire was having a sale so I impulsively bought one. And by “impulsively” I mean I kept refreshing the page for hours because apparently everyone and their dog was trying to buy from Canadian Tire that day.

I just assumed it would arrive quickly. It did not. By the time I got it in the mail I was already back at work. I was on two weeks self isolation in March but after that ended I was back at work because I’m deemed essential.

To help you realize how dumb of a purchase this was for me, I bought it in March, I finally got around to opening the box in July. The end of July. As in, the very end of July. And that was only the packing box! The actual box with the Dutch oven in it was opened yesterday. Yeah that’s right. August 5th. Go ahead. Judge me. I can take it. 😜

It is now washed, dried, and I’m trying to figure out where it is going to live. Obviously in the back of a cupboard where it isn’t blocking access to any of the other kitchen tools I don’t use.

I mean seriously, I couldn’t have at least bought a new purse? That would’ve had way better odds of being used! 😂

Cats and Gravity

3 Jul

I put off swapping a load of laundry because Striker was stretched along my legs, completely passed out, and incredibly adorable. I figured I’d just wait until he chose to get up, ya know, as one tends to do.

He rolled over and I’m not really sure what happened but things went wrong and next thing you know he’s flopped on the floor on his side.

Before you freak out, he’s fine! The only thing hurt is his pride.

Striker did what a cat always does when slightly less graceful than normal, he immediately went to his food bowl and started eating like that was the plan the whole time.

I, like the mean human I am, laughed a little. Then I took advantage of not having Striker on my lap, and dealt with the laundry.

When I came back into my apartment Striker was not only unimpressed with my behaviour but outright cranky about it. It took cuddles, and apologies, and slight grovelling, to get his forgiveness. Even with all of that he is still giving me this expression…

Unimpressed cat

Perhaps I’m not quite forgiven after all?

Canada Day 2020

1 Jul

Happy Canada Day! Hope it was fun, not too wet, involved at least one person you are fond of, and that you were safe while celebrating!

Canada-Day 2020

Not the usual Canada Day message lol

I worried this year, that people would be stupid, say screw the self distancing and masks and being careful, all because they wanted to enjoy the day. I think partly that didn’t happen because so many events and celebrations were cancelled, and partly it might be possible that I should give people a bit more credit to not make a dumb choice that puts everyone they come near at risk.

Or hey, maybe there were tons of parties happening, and people breaking all the rules in place to keep us safe, and two weeks from now we’ll have new outbreaks. What do I know? 😛

My day was spent at work, enjoying the Canada Day celebration we had there, which was odd, but fun in its own way. Then I did a quick workout and came home. That’s it. It is possibly the quietest Canada Day I have ever had.

Thanks to Canada Day celebrations being online I got to enjoy fireworks in the comfort of my own home, I’ll put a link to the video below. I could have gone outside at 10pm, pointed my phone at the sky, and apparently seen virtual fireworks but it is raining here and that just wasn’t a thing that was gonna happen…by me anyways. I’m sure some people went out and tried.

I also enjoyed some of the concerts put on by various Canadian artists, or I suppose it was technically one concert with each artist being in a different place, and clips being shown one after the other.

I’m adding a small selection of some of the clips, they are all on YouTube if you want to find more.

You probably didn’t spend today how you wanted to, just like you haven’t spent the year how you wanted to, and that sucks. The restrictions we follow seem that much tighter on special days, because aren’t those days supposed to be exempt some how? Except of course they aren’t, we just wish they were.

I’m sorry if your Canada Day wasn’t what you wished it was. I hope though, that you were safe, and those you care for are safe, and that you can find some bit of the day that made you smile.

A Snippet of Adulting

15 Jun

This morning while waiting for the kettle to boil so I could make tea I had nothing to do. Instead of just standing there I prepped my breakfast for the next two days.

Now, before you start to be mildly impressed at this random burst of responsibility let me point out my meal prep consisted of measuring oats into Tupperware bowls, tossing in measured toppings, and popping the lids on the bowls.

Not exactly rocket science, or even cooking.

Despite how ridiculously easy that was I have decided that was some weird combo of adulting and self care, and if that’s the level I managed of those two things today, well, that’s the level.

Not everyday can involve meal prepping entire dishes for the week ahead. Not every act of self care can be something Instagram worthy.

Some days tiny, almost insignificant actions, can be what result in an easier time later in the week; which to me equates to self care, and in this case meal prep, in the most loosely used definition of the term.

So try to give yourself a bit of credit for the small things you do for yourself. They count. You know why they count? Because I said so! And if that isn’t a classic adult answer I don’t know what is lol

Never Just An Oil Change

13 Jun

An oil change never ends up being just an oil change, have you noticed that? Sometimes the add on expense is a new filter, you grumble a bit, but get over it quickly. Other times the unexpected expense brings your total cost to $1698.42 and you want to cry a little. Or eat cake. I really wanted to eat cake, sigh.

Turns out my front brakes were at 5% and my rear brakes were at 20%. Not good! The mechanic was surprised because the test run he did with my suv had no squealy brake noises, no indicators anything was wrong with them. Poor little suv was chugging along like everything was fine when in reality she was hurting…I’m sure there is a metaphor in there somewhere but I’m too focused on the new balance of my Visa statement to figure it out.

In the end the front brake pads and rotors were replaced, as were the rear brake pads and rotors, the front brake hoses were replaced because they had holes in them, they performed a brake fluid flush, and oh yeah, the actual oil change.

Here I had been so cocky that I had $126 saved up, enough to get the oil change and pay for whatever little thing they would say also needed replacing, all paid for without having to pull out the credit card. As it turns out, that $126 won’t even make a dent in the bill and Friday, which is sit down and budget day, is going to be a day of math magic while I figure out how to deal with this unexpected expense.

I’m trying to focus on the bright side of things, and the list I have is as follows:

I was told that if I had kept driving my front brakes would have been grinding metal on metal within two weeks, so yay that I avoided that!

This was all an unexpected find, I went it there thinking nothing was wrong with my suv, so thank goodness I went in and this was found before something worse happened.

The shop I go to is run by an amazing guy who knows I work Sundays through Thursdays,  he stayed late to get everything fixed so I could pick it up and have it for when I work on Sunday, saving me the expense of a rental vehicle.

I’m lucky enough to be able to take on the debt of this bill and still be able to pay rent and buy groceries.

So yeah, in the end does it suck all of a sudden having this huge bill to pay? Yeah, of course it does. But it would be a hell of a lot worse to have had the brakes fail and be in an accident, or do that metal on metal grinding thing, or have a less competent mechanic who didn’t notice something didn’t look quite right and dig a little deeper to discover how bad of shape my brakes were in.

Every time I get pouty about my new Visa balance I’m going to do my best to remind myself of all those positives, and maybe, just maybe, get myself a slice of chocolate cake because hey, I’m human, and sometimes cake helps make things a little bit better. 😉

choc cake

Mimicking the Cat

20 May

On a recent day off I decided to do to Striker (the cat) what he does to me. Seemed only fair to show him what it’s like being on the receiving end of certain behaviours, right?

Here is what I learned…

What I did: got super close to his sleeping face and stared until he woke up.

What I learned: Striker doesn’t like that. Don’t do that. A startled awake cat is an unhappy cat.

What I did: I couldn’t stand on his chest while he was laying down and try to limit his breathing ability so instead I laid my head on his tummy area when he was laying on his side.

What I learned: Striker doesn’t like that. Don’t do that. A squished cat is an unhappy cat…who may or may not decide to bring out the claws.

What I did: talked to Striker incessantly because I could almost see the bottom of my bowl and I was obviously being starved.

What I learned: Striker doesn’t like that. Don’t do that. A cat being irritated by a talking human is a cat thinking of how best to get his human to shut up…permanently.

What I did: I got in bed first and spread eagled to take up as much space as possible, leaving Striker to get comfy in what little space was left.

What I learned: Striker doesn’t like that. Don’t do that. Striker will one hundred percent meow at me loudly until I move so he can have the prime spot on the bed.

And lastly…

What I did: commented on every yawn and stretch I did all day instead of comment on Striker’s adorable yawns and stretches.

What I learned: Striker couldn’t care less about that and is adept at ignoring me.

My life lesson from this is don’t pretend to be a cat, I can’t be as good of a cat as Striker can and mimicking Striker put me in danger of claws and teeth and revenge, not exactly ideal.

A Perspective Thing

2 May

If you were to ask me how the day went, and then ask the cat how the day went, you’d get drastically different descriptions despite our having spent the bulk of the day together.

My relating of today goes something like this…

Got to sleep in, which was nice, eventually got up, made breakfast, fed the cat, chilled with a couple episodes of Criminal Minds, realized I can’t be super lazy all day so went for a walk and was gone about an hour and a half. Once home did a quick vacuum of the living room, kitchen, and bedroom, started the laundry, made dinner, sat down to eat and watch more Criminal Minds. Between changing the loads of laundry I cuddled with the cat. All in all a pretty chill day.

The cat’s version of today is a tad different…

Was forced to wake up before I was ready, that human just can’t figure out the proper time to get up. Walked the human to the kitchen and was not at all surprised she put her needs before mine when it came to getting breakfast ready. Why she thinks it is ok to make her tea and toast her bagel before getting me fresh water and food is beyond me. Switched napping locations to the ottoman in the living room, I refuse to let her have the use of the entire ottoman for fear she will get spoiled and think it is hers. For a while I lay on her legs, I like stealing her body heat and it’s funny when she starts to get uncomfortable but doesn’t move because I’m on her. She had the nerve to get up and go outside! I definitely did not give her permission to do that. She was gone so long I thought I had been abandoned and was going to have to ration my food and water until rescued. Eventually she returned, I refused to acknowledge her, someone who would leave me like that doesn’t deserve my affection. I was then harassed by the evil loud machine that wants to eat me. Using all my stealth and speed I outwitted it once again. Instead of eating me it ate all my shed fur, the pieces of cardboard I had scratched and spread on the carpet, and the kitty litter I expertly kick out of the box and on to the floor. All that hard work destroyed! I immediately started replacing what it had eaten from the floor. The cardboard pieces are not as many as they once were but I will fix that over the next couple of days. I have already kicked more litter out of the box and despite my human trying to catch my fur that sheds when she pets me so she can put it in the garbage I have successfully left some fur on the carpet, the ottoman, and the living room throw blanket. I have been extremely productive today and deserve treats, obviously. After dinner I got the human to make a blanket fort for me to sleep in but she kept messing it up by leaving to go “switch laundry”, whatever that means. I employed my cutest positions and got her to stop getting up when the faint buzzer sound came from the other room thereby ensuring I got some much needed uninterrupted sleep. Now the human is up late waiting for the “last load to finish” and I am forced to sleep resting against her outstretched leg. I make sure to deep sigh and look at her with my sad eyes every ten minutes or so, making sure she realizes she is letting me down. I want to go to bed but have to wait for her so I can take the best spot right before she tries to get in the bed. It has been a traumatizing and exhaustive day, I can’t wait to get some sleep so I can be ready for my early morning tapping of the human’s face.

No Spend Challenge

23 Apr

My landlady, in a joking way, texted me saying she thinks I may have an online shopping problem.

I got all excited because I thought that meant an item I bought online last week and have been anxiously waiting for had arrived, but realized it can’t be that item because I am signed up for text notifications and hadn’t received one saying it was delivered. So I started to text her back to let her know the list of things I am waiting for only to realize the list is uh, let’s say, substantial, and having to type it all wasn’t going to make me look good.

I fully understood her joke when I got home and found not one but three packages waiting for me.

Three! It’s like a random personal Christmas out of nowhere. And it really is out of nowhere since all three of these packages took way longer than expected to get to me. Something online shopping teaches you, if you aren’t shopping with Amazon Prime that is, is patience.

The first package I opened is a t-shirt from one of those annoying ads you see on Facebook. It was cheap, and cute, and I decided to buy one t-shirt to see what their quality is like. The shirt fits, and smells horrible, so it is now in the hamper and we’ll see how good it looks once it’s been through the wash. I hope it stays cute!

The second item is stamps. Yeah yeah, I know, the post offices are still open, why was I so incredibly lazy and unwilling to go in to one to buy stamps? I actually have a valid reason for this! The post offices by me are tiny, and in the backs of small stores, and I am supposed to be avoiding places like that to decrease my chance of exposure and by extension risk to the seniors I work with. I thought buying stamps online from Canada Post would be the easiest purchase, and fastest delivery, since ya know, they are the ones delivering them.

No. That thinking is incredibly wrong. After you buy them you get an email saying they will process your order in three days. Not have them to you in three days, or in the mail in three days, but that they will take three whole days just to process the order. Oh, and they come from Ottawa, case you were wondering, so three days to start processing the order, then delivery time from Ottawa, they took almost two weeks to get to me.

But that’s ok, because patience. It is a virtue, it is a thing best practiced over and over…and over…

And over yet again by the book I ordered that finally arrived. That one took about a month.

But really, what does delivery time matter, right? They all arrived eventually, if somewhat embarrassingly on the same day, and I now feel like maybe I am buying too much stuff.

I don’t think of myself as someone who tends to randomly purchase things online, I will look, then talk myself out of it, but looks like two times I didn’t talk myself out of it…I’m leaving the stamps off this list because I do actually need them, so what’s with all the shopping?

Before you say two items isn’t that big a deal, I have more things on their way to me…oops?

Looks like this is the perfect time to start a No Spend Challenge.

April 22 2020 a

What is a No Spend Challenge you ask? It is exactly what it sounds like. For the next two weeks the only things I will spend money on are food, gas for the suv, bills, and $8 I owe a friend who is doing a fundraiser. It doesn’t have to be for two weeks, you can set any time frame you want, I’m choosing to ease myself in to this and picked a short time frame to start with.

I’m leaving myself a teeny tiny loophole, due to the pandemic, that if yet another emergency situation pops up, I mean c’mon, we haven’t been swarmed by locust yet so there are still some ways things could get worse, I may expand the list to random emergency items I can’t think of at this moment in time.

This means no more online shopping when I’m bored, or feeling a bit sad, or anxious, or because something cute caught my eye at random (*cough* t-shirt *cough*). To make it more likely I will succeed at this challenge I need things to do when I feel like shopping, distractions to stop me from hitting that checkout button.

So far I have come up with reading one of the many books that are in this apartment, writing cards or letters to people, exercising, trying to read the cat’s mind, cleaning (let’s be honest, this one probably won’t happen but I feel like it is expected to be on the list), and practice my knitting (I am learning and need all the practice I can get). Did you notice what all these things have in common? Well, except for trying to read the cat’s mind that is.

Hands. They are all things that will keep my hands busy. Busy so they can’t be tapping the screen of my iPad or typing on my laptop, busy so I am physically engaged in an activity that will not only keep my brain somewhat occupied but also my body. I find if I can keep one of those two busy I am less likely to engage in a behaviour I am trying to avoid, if I can keep both busy I do an even better job of it.

If you have any suggestions for things I can do instead of shop feel free to share them!

April 22 2020

Striker thinks spending more time petting him is an excellent way to stay busy, so looks like I’m adding that to my list…the top of my list if Striker has anything to say about it!

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