Weird Vibes

16 May

So word got out at work about my being laid off – talk about awkward! Nobody said anything directly to me, they just kept looking at me with pity and almost saying something then stopping themselves – annoying! That was worse then people coming up to me and saying stuff. sigh.

The only one who did anything was AB who commiserated with me for a bit then emailed me two links to some really great job listing boards – now that’s way better then a weird smile! 😀 I’ve scoped the boards out and already found about 5 jobs to apply for, yah! None of them are a dream job or anything but they are all jobs I should have the qualifications for and might at least have a chance to get…

I was starving all day today! All Day!! I knew it wasn’t real hunger, it was psychological, but that doesn’t make it any less hard to deal with. I had properly spaced out meals and snacks and they were all normal sizes and healthy which helped me to not cave and eat more then I should but oh geez was it hard! I kept wanting to go get a bagel, or a bowl of cereal, or go buy a scone – something…anything! I knew in my head it was stress hunger, not real hunger but I sure wish I could have convinced my stomach of that. Luckily I had some mini cucumbers with me so I ate those for an afternoon snack but if I hadn’t had those I think for sure I’d of caved. *shakes head* Hell, it’s almost 9:15pm right now and I am starving all over again even though I have eaten all my points and had a crazy huge dinner. I hate stress hunger. sigh.

Today I ate:

1 raspberry turnover cookie = 2 points

1 Hearty Medley’s = 2 points

1 apple = 1 point

1 Campbell’s Spicy fiesta black bean and veggie soup = 4 points

1/2 bagel = 1.5 points

2 mini cucumbers = 0 points

1 cup brown rice = 4 points

mixed cooked veggies = 0 points

1 light hot dog wiener = 1 point

cashews = 1 point

2 raspberry turnover cookies = 4 points

Total points eaten = 20.5

Ok, so I went over by 0.5, so shoot me. 😛 lol. The kitchen at work ran out of bread so my only option, literally Only option, was half a bagel. Maybe I shouldn’t of had any bread but how could I not put some form of bread with my soup – it’s just un-natural to eat only soup. lol. That and I really wanted some carbs. 😛

You may be wondering what is with the raspberry turnover cookies – they are such amazingly good cookies, Mmm! I bought them at walmart cause they were only $2 for a package and I was weak. shrug. They are 2 points each though so I have to be careful when I eat them and how many I eat at a time. Sooooo, one this morning before I left the house, and then cause I had stir fry for dinner and it’s so low in points I got to have 2 this evening for my night time snack. They were delish, and I don’t regret eating them but I am feeling so hungry that I wish I’d had something more filling for my last 4 points…altho, really, anything I would have eaten would have been about the same level of filling so I’d still be hungry…which sucks.

I wonder if working on my resume, thereby increasing my chances of getting a job, will decrease my stress and help my stomach to not feel hungry all the time? I think I will test this theory and go work on my resume…not fun, but productive and I guess that’s good…


2 Responses to “Weird Vibes”

  1. Dacia May 18, 2011 at 5:15 am #

    Boo, that. I am sorry people are being weird and awkward towards you. That sucks. Don’t take it to heart though, they probably just don’t know how to act in this situation. Not that it makes it better. I hope it gets better for you. I am here for you if you ever need anything! Just let me know.

    • shrinkingwmn May 20, 2011 at 10:19 pm #

      Yeah, I think you’re right, that they just aren’t sure what to say or how to act…I have found that if I initiate a convo with someone they are ok, it’s like they need to see me be normal and not crazed-over-emotional, once they know I am still acting like me they act normal too…weird but oh well. lol Thanks for the support – I really appreciate it. 🙂

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