Tag Archives: auditions

Middle Ground

15 Mar

I’ve got a pair of pants that when I bought them I thought they fit but once I got them home and wore them out for the first time I realized they were actually a bit too big. The crotch (I hate that word! lol) was too low so it rubbed against the inside of my thighs causing pain and raw skin…too much info? only happens to me? Yeah, sigh, figures… πŸ˜‰ lol

Anyways! I put the pants in the dryer, a calculated risk, that I hoped would prove to be a smart idea. It did, sorta. The pants, after a couple runs through the dryer fit better around the waist, butt, hips and leg areas. They were a tad shorter than I like but not so much shorter I can’t still wear them with a variety of shoes. Phew! My legs are so long I hang to dry all pants because they can very quickly become too short and I look like that person who is expecting a flood 24/7 lol πŸ˜›

So today for work I wore the pants. I was maaaaaybe an hour in to my shift and every time I was standing or walking I was also pulling the pants up a bit and wishing I’d worn a belt. They were fitting looser in all areas but of course were still the tad too short they had been since the dryer stints.

I don’t know if this means I have lost a little bit of weight (please oh please mean I have lost some weight! *crosses fingers*) or if it means my pants have stretched out a bit or didn’t shrink quite as much as I realized. Obviously I’m hoping I got smaller not that my pants got bigger.

I seem to appear to be back in the middle ground of clothing sizes. I hate the middle ground. For those of you who don’t know what I’m talking about, it is that stage where you are becoming too small for one size but are still too big for the next size down so your clothes don’t fit nicely no matter what you wear. It sucks even if it is an indication you’re on the right track.

this goes for all clothes

this goes for all clothes

Thing is, I can’t think of anything that would have made me slim down a bit so I’m leaning towards the pants stretching out, which sucks.

I’ve been working on making small changes with my food, cutting out the processed foods I’d been enjoying during my off season, drinking more water, making sure to get protein in at every meal (well, ok, almost every meal, this is me after all lol), and, the big one, I’m eating less peanut butter! Shocking I know! I mean c’mon, I am the person who happily eats a couple spoonfuls of peanut butter and considers it a meal lol But yeah, small changes to my eating, nothing major, nothing to warrant slimming down enough to make pants fit looser.

One happy bonus to the pants fitting loosely this evening was it made it easier to resist bad-for-me-foods cause I kept thinking “if I have lost some weight I don’t wanna gain it back by making a stupid food choice” lol Oh the things I use for increasing my willpower! πŸ˜›

I have noticed lately that I am finding it easier to resist the foods that usually have me caving. Weird huh? Weird but awesome! If I walk through the bakery section at the grocery store I may glance at all the bakery items I usually drool over but I don’t pause and I definitely don’t buy. I contemplated pizza earlier in the week but easily managed to not order it. I’m finding it easier to not eat the foods at work.

I’m not sure where this increase in willpower has come from but I like it! πŸ™‚ Maybe it’s because it’s dragon boat season again and I want to be in peak condition for practices and for the upcoming race season. Maybe it’s because I am “training” for the BMO Run and keep having horrifying images of a fat me being the last to cross the finish line at the run. Maybe it’s because I have had two auditions in the past two weeks (hoorah!) and want to look better and better for each upcoming audition. That and obviously the more confident I feel about how I look the less I will worry about it when in front of the camera meaning the more I can focus on my acting…and the Β more I will look “right” according to casting directors.

It’s probably some combination of all these things and more, who knows what is lurking in my sub-conscious? lol πŸ˜‰

Whatever it is, I am glad for it. Glad to be that person who easily walks past all the high calorie, processed, so tasty but so bad for me foods and buys the healthy stuff. Glad to be getting back to the way I used to be. Glad that this juuuuust might be the first step towards a healthier, stronger, slimmer me. *crosses fingers*

take the first step, put down the cookie!

take the first step, put down the cookie!


7 Second Slate

16 Jan

Slate: a quick blurb you say about yourself on camera right before the start of an audition to make it easier for the casting directors to know who they are watching. In your slate you generally say some combination of your name, your agent info and what role you are auditioning for.

Easy peasy. πŸ™‚


Well, there is a new type of slate being used in the acting world and today I filmed one. It was 7 seconds and I had to say my name and something about me that is not about acting. I had 7 seconds to show my personality, make myself sound interesting and basically convince people I have never met to choose me to see in person.

omg! Who can do that in 7 seconds?! lol

Oddly enough I find it harder to do a slate than to do an audition scene. Either type of slate! I think because slipping in to the skin of a character is easy, and since you are no longer you but your character it doesn’t matter what you do in front of the camera cause it isn’t you, it is the character you are being. But a slate? Ugh. You have a super short window of time to show who you are, while saying a blurb of information, and for some reason I always turn in to a bit of a robot when I do a slate.

Today, after I did my second take the camera guy said, and I quote “ok, that was good, let’s do one more and try to have fun” Fun. *rolls eyes* I do have fun when acting but sooooometimes I have to be reminded of that, usually during an especially intense scene, which for anybody reading this who isn’t into acting is kinda normal so don’t go thinking I suck or something lol But to need to be reminded to have fun while doing a slate? Makes me want to kick myself a little bit lol The next take was much better, in fact, it was the one we used, so yay!

For the slate I had to dress in the same outfit I wore for my main head shot and I had to try to make myself look as close to my head shot as possible, this means I had to make myself look purdy πŸ˜‰ lol So today I was that girl who had the makeup and hair done, the cute dress and high heeled boots on and wow is it funny how you get completely different looks when dressed like that vs wearing yoga pants and a hoodie lol

Dressing up like that always makes me feel a bit like an imposter lol

I’m going to pretend you are interested in why these 7 second slates are being filmed and explain where they are used lol Feel free to skip ahead if you *gasp* aren’t curious…though how could you not be? πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜›

There is a website that is used by agents, casting directors and actors for setting up auditions. It isn’t the only way auditions are set up but one of them. As an actor it is my responsibility to have an updated resume, head shots, demo reel and now a slate on the site. My agent can submit my page from that website to casting directors who are posting casting calls and auditions. When my page gets submitted the casting director will take a look, see my head shot, check out my resume and if they like what they see they will then click on my head shot and they will get a pop up page that will show them my 7 second slate. This gives them a chance to hear my voice, see my body language, witness my energy…basically give them more information so they can decide if they want to see me in person or not.

So far there is only one website that is using this 7 second slate, other sites you can upload your demo reel either for free or for a small amount of money and the casting director can watch that instead. This particular site wants to charge me $22 per minute for my demo reel! Ridonkulous! Which means they get my little slate and not my demo reel cause dude, I’m not made of money, eesh.

So yeah, my day was planned around filming something that lasts 7 seconds lol Oh the weird life of an actor πŸ˜›

Afterwards I grabbed some take out sushi, hung out at a friend’s house for a couple hours, came back to my place did some random tidying up, put laundry in, plopped my butt down in my living room chair and proceeded to watch really boring tv lol. I decided I was fed up with my viewing options and was starting to stand up so I could go change and go to the gym when my timer beeped reminding I had to switch over the laundry and poof! my plan of going to the gym went up in smoke cause oops, I’d kinda forgotten I had clothes in the machines and other stuff waiting to go in. I hate being that person who takes up the laundry machines by not removing my stuff within five minutes of the machines being done so no way was I gonna go out, especially when I still had a whole other load to go in the wash. My laundry didn’t finish till 10:49pm and my gym closes at 11pm so guess who completely missed out on a gym visit due to laundry? Yup. This girl. How dumb is that?!

I’m gonna set my alarm for earlier then normal tomorrow morning and see if I can drag my butt out of bed early enough to go to the gym before work but considering how much I hate mornings I’m not holding out much hope I’ll make it to the gym. lol. And no, I don’t even feel bad saying that cause I figure hey, least I know myself! πŸ˜€

Best. Day. Ever.

10 Dec


Did I say ohmygod! enough times? No, I think I need one more…

Oh. My. Gaaaaawd!Β 


Remember how yesterday I mentioned I had an appointment to go to today at 1pm? I purposefully didn’t say what the appointment was for because I am superstitious and didn’t want to jinx anything but it has happened, epic things came of it, and now I get to bring you up to date! *girly squeal*

I had an interview with an agent, an agent at a really good Talent Agency, to see about signing to his roster and have him represent me.

When I initially contacted the agency D responded and said they were only looking to expand their commercial roster right now and if I was interested then yes I could send my info to him. What this means is I would be put in for auditions for commercials but not for tv shows or movies. Well, I want to go for tv and film roles but am aware I have to earn my way up the ladder so I said yes I’d be open to commercial representation. I figured get my foot in the door, after I’ve proven myself talk to them about also repping me for tv shows and film. Sounds good, right? Right!

Well, while we were talking he said that even though they are expanding their commercial roster he can tell that I am “meant for tv and film” and he is going to start me with commercials but push to get me out there for tv and film auditions quickly because it is obvious that is what I am meant to be doing! Oh. My. God! Yesssss! πŸ˜€

What would normally be a one hour interview became a bit over two hours and he offered me a spot on his roster right then and there, no having to wait and let him think about it or meet with the others on his team, he wanted me. Just as I am. Amazing. Just…wow…

We had such an instant and solid connection that I already knew I wanted to sign with him and am so thrilled he feels the same! πŸ˜€

Normally I would never try to get an agent in December, it is such a bad month for that. Agents are already thinking vacation, filming has shut down for the holidays, the only people really working are doing prep things for January (like costume fittings etc), it is traditionally a horrible month to try to find representation. A friend of mine who is also signed with this agency recommended them to me and when I took a look at them I had this feeling…I know, sounds hokey, but that really is what happened, I just had a feeling I should apply. Forget that it is a bad month for it, forget that I am not at my “perfect weight” yet, forget all the logical reasons for not applying, just apply! It is what my gut was saying and I decided to listen. Man am I glad I listened!

The lull in the industry for the next couple weeks is perfect too. D said he will use the next two weeks to get all my online profiles etc looking the way they should, everything can get shifted to show I am signed with D, my brand can be re-worked a bit so when January gets here everything will be good to go and he can start submitting me asap for auditions. Who’d of thought a lull in filming would be a good thing? lol

We talked about getting me in front of casting directors, workshops, my headshots, all kinds of things. He is so pro-active about getting me seen and getting me in the audition room that I feel really confident about what we can accomplish. πŸ™‚

Oh, and get this! He never once said I have to lose weight! He believes in diversification, he knows the trends are changing, people want to see a wider variety of looks on screen and instead of trying to force me to look like everyone else he is going to promote me the way I am, because I have my own look, I am unique, there is no one else that looks like me and the industry is changing and seeing they need that different look. I love this man. I have had agents say they won’t put me out for work until I get 15 pounds underweight! Not “lose a bit of weight” but “get 15 pounds underweight”! that is so unhealthy! Not just for the body but the psyche. Being told you are worthless as an actor until you are underweight by a noticeable amount, not cool. It really messes with a girl, boo! But D, he loves how I look. He loves how I can pull of different “types” (badass, down to earth, quirky etc) and what is great is he noticed while we talked all those different parts of my personality (and more) which means he is observant and will be better able to sell me to casting directors because he really does know I can be all those different things, he isn’t just making it up.

Can ya tell I’m still over the moon about today? lol

This morning I was an unrepresented actor with not a lot of hope for landing a well paying roll. Tonight I go to bed a represented actor whose chances just got a whole hell of a lot better.

I can’t wait for 2014 to get here, I am going to make it my year!

Maijah Lewk Logo

Fish Cause Me Stress

12 Oct

I haven’t cooked a salmon steak in a while, months an months I think which is sorta weird since for a while I was eating them at least 2 times a week. I buy them from M&M Meat Shops and they are way delish, they come in a variety of flavours (different sauces) and in my opinion are a win-win option for dinner cause they are easy to cook (for someone who isn’t me lol), taste great, are only 3 points and are the perfect size for your protein. πŸ™‚

Here is my dilemna when it comes to cooking the salmon steaks though, I suck at cooking! and when it comes to cooking meat, poultry or fish I have stress because I worry I am going to poison myself by not cooking it through properly. I have no desire to be throwing up my dinner due to my inability to cook the meat, poultry or fish properly…does anybody have that desire? Doubtful! πŸ˜›

Well, tonights salmon steak had a sauce that is freakishly similar in colour to the colour of the fish…uh, durn. That’s problematic. sigh.

Part of my stress comes from my stove, it cooks hotter then it should so for everything I put in it the temp is 25 degrees lower then what the cooking directions instructΒ (so instead of heating the oven to 450 I heat it to 425) and I always cook/bake the food for anywhere from 2-8 minutes less then what the cooking directions are. I know I have to do this or risk whatever is in the oven becoming a blackened lump of charcoal, ick. Well, the act of cooking an animal product for less time then what the package says to causes me worry cause in my head if the package says “cook for 17 minutes” it should be cooked for 17 minutes or there is risk of my dying…dramatic? Yes. So what? lol

The salmon steaks are supposed to be cooked for 17 minutes but I always put them in for 15 minutes and they turn out fine. This evening though something just didn’t seem right…When I took the fish out of the oven it looked not as cooked as I recall the other salmon steaks looking. Normally some of the sauce is burned around the circumfrence of the fish but not this time…at first I thought score! I finally didn’t lose any sauce due to burning it! Yah!

Well, by the time I got part way through the fish I was noticing the colour and texture of the fish didn’t seem quite right…it was reminding me of sashimi (the colouring anyways) and wasn’t very hot. I put the not-hot issue down to me eating my rice and mixed veggies first, shrug, figured the fish cooled down quicker then I expected but the colour…well…no explaining that away lol It got to the point where instead of eating the fish I was pulling it apart trying to figure out if the funny colour was the sauce, or the lighting, or my cooking…in the end I couldn’t tell and didn’t want to risk eating even more of it in case it was not properly cooked so in to the garbage it went…which sucked cause I was still hungry! lol

I had a bowl of cereal afterwards to make up for the smaller then planned dinner. πŸ˜›

Today I ate:

1 Hearty Medley’s = 3 points

1 fried egg = 2 points

1 cheese slice = 1 point

1 piece toast = 1.5 points

1/2 C maple baked beans = 2 points

1 salmon steak = 3 points

mixed veggies = 0 points

1/2 C brown rice = 2 points

1 tbls soy sauce = 0 points

55 g Flax Plus cereal = 5 points

1/4 C 1% milk = 0.5 points

1 pckg Special K Fruit crisps = 2 points

1 Weight Watcher’s one bite coconut chocolate = 1 point

Total Points Eaten = 23

Exercise Points Earned = 7

On the acting front my agent is already proving her worth. πŸ˜€ She called me today to find out what I am doing tomorrow and on Monday, there was a toothbrush commercial she wanted to submit me for. Like I was gonna say I was busy? lol I told her I was available so she submitted me. Unfortunatly I didn’t get the audition. Now, before you think my not getting the audition is my fault let me explain how this whole system works. Your agent gets informed of a production that needs actor submissions, they contact their actor and make sure the person is available, they submit their actor, the casting directors receive like 300 and up submissions all for one part, they go through them in the order they receive them and once they have about 20 actors chosen to see they stop looking at the rest of the submissions. By choosing 20 actors to audition they are booking themselves for an entire day which is why they don’t look at more then that. So even though my agent was on the ball so are other agents in this city and more then likely I was in the group of people that didn’t even get looked at. Lame huh? The only hope is that the people they audition they don’t like so they will do a second round of auditions, lol,Β if they do that they look at the original submissions so maybe they will choose me then. But really, it’s one of those don’t hold your breath situations. lol.

However, when she called to tell me she hadn’t heard back in regards to the submission for the toothbrush commercial she let me know she had a voiceover job she wanted to submit me for and was I cool with that? Of course I said yes! lol.

Two submissions in one day and I haven’t even been signed with her for a week – awesome! πŸ˜€ Even if I don’t get an audition for the voiceover job it’s all good cause the more times she submits me for auditions the more casting directors see my portfolio and the more likely they will eventually be all “let’s see what she’s got”. Also, a lot of casting directors like to wait until you have been submitted for three projects they are working on before calling you in for an audition because they want to see that you are persistant and serious in this business…they don’t wanna take their time giving an audition to someone who is only “trying out” acting and not serious about it…it’s the Rule Of Three.

I figure I didn’t poison myself with the fish as I haven’t had to go running to the bathroom so bonus there and while I’m a bit bummed I didn’t get the toothbrush commercial (I have really good teeth and a decent smile!…thanks to my parents paying oodles of money to teeth people over the years lol Thanks mom and dad! πŸ™‚ ) I’m hopeful another audition will come up soon…least my agent is actively working on my behalf – so she’s already doing better then the last agent I had lol. πŸ˜€ Score!

Work, Bugs, Audition, Hot Jeans and Cancelled Plans

1 Sep

Aaaahhh, what a nice calm day, yeah right! A roller coaster of thoughts and feelings…just the way I like it! πŸ˜€

Let’s start at the beginning…work! I sat with IF (yes, that is initials not the word if lol) cause she has been training me for the new job I am being bumped up to. She totally rocks. So much fun to sit with and she’s teaching me well. πŸ™‚ Not like I wanna be doing this job or working in this industry forever but it’s ok for now. Work was all good today, I am picking up the new stuff fairly quickly and am starting to feel more comfortable about the whole thing. It’s much easier getting through the work day when you aren’t floundering around trying to figure out what the hell is going on. lol.

However, at lunch time the day went a tad bit icky. I was eating my 1 cup of cherries, these are the oh so fresh cherries I bought at the farmer’s market this past sunday. One of them tasted a bit funny, no biggy right? It happens. shrug. But then I looked down in to the container and saw something on one of the cherries, a little white fleck. Now, this is weird cause I wash all my fruit uber carefully so I wondered what it could be. I took a closer look and was worried, the white fleck looked like it might be a bug, but no, that can’t be, I wash all my fruit. I poked at it with my fingernail and it moved, MOVED!!!! It was a little white bug! Some kind of miniature white worm – least that’s what it looked like. Talk about disgusting!!! So I do what any sane person who finds bugs in their fruit does…I pushed the fruit to the side and decided to eat my blackberries instead. They are also from the farmer’s market so I was looking at them with a stink eye and it turns out I had reason. sigh. There was another little white baby worm thing in the container with the blackberries! Now this is more then I can handle…I dumped them all in to the compost bin and drank some tea to try to get rid of the idea I swallowed bugs. What if I missed some? What if they got in my mouth? What if they were still in my mouth worming around my teeth? Or worse! What if they are in my stomach, or crawling up my esophagus?? Oh the horrible ideas that are flying through my head because of those two worms. The whole rest of the work day I kept flashing back to those stupid bugs. Ugh. *sick face*

See, this is why I like pesticides…stupid farmer’s market! I am never buying food from there again. From now on only produce that has been sprayed with various chemicals to kill all those nasty creepy crawly things! I’d rather wash off chemicals then wash off “natural whatever” and find out some stupid bugs made it through. *shudder*

The bugs helped keep my mind off my nervousness for my audition. I haven’t beenΒ to one in a while cause of all theΒ agent drama that happened. This is for a non-union job in a short film so no agent needed to get the audition. I was sooooo nervous! Mostly cause I was worried I’d screw up something. lol. The guy who ran the room was great. πŸ™‚ Totally put me at ease, he was a great reader and I had so much fun! Auditions totally get my adrenaline flying, it’s better then anything out there for an all natural high. A person isn’t living unless they are in front of a camera. πŸ˜€ Anyways, the whole thing went great, great experience, lots of fun, felt really good about what I did. And now I will put it away cause once the auditions over you hafta drop it otherwise you’ll over think everything you did and drive yourself nuts. lol.

Total bonus though, I wore a sweet pair of jeans and looked totally hot in them! Least, I felt like I looked hot in them. I reminded myself before going in front of the camera thatΒ I have lost 9 lbs which means I will look better in front of the camera then I did previously. The confidence I got from my outfit was great. πŸ˜€ I can’t wait till I have lost even more, imagine how much better I will feel about myself then?

On to the cancelled plans, a friend of mine bought a tanning studio and I thought today was the grand re-opening but I had the day wrong so I am going tomorrow after work instead. That works out better for me anyways since by the time the audition was over I was hungry and ready to go home and make dinner. One thing about auditions, when they are over I am always ravenous, I think cause of the adrenaline that gets pumping. It feels like the equivalent of exercising…but in a good way!

So there we go, today started with normal work stuff, then the realization I was getting better and feeling good about it, then being disgusted because of the bugs, switch from that to confidence cause of how I looked once I changed and did my makeup for the audition, then I was running high and felt like I could rule the world and that the “acting thing” will definitly work out for me, after that I was a tad relieved cause I didn’t want to postpone dinner, lol, always ruled by my stomach. πŸ˜› Now I am exhausted and on my way to bed to recover from the ups and downs of my day.

A quick run down of my food from today:

3/4 cup Blueberry Special K = 2 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

1 banana = 2 points

1 cup grapes = 1 point

1 cup soup = 2 points

1 whole wheat bagel = 4 points

2 triangles Light Laughing Cow cheese = 1 point

snap peas = 0 points

1 medium slush = 2 points

85 grams Alexia Yam fries = 3 points

100 grams beefless tips = 2 points

grilled veggies = 0 points

1 tsp becel oil = 1 point

1 package Thinsations Choc covered pretzels = 2 points

I used 23 points today. One over my allowed daily points but that’s what flex points are for. lol. πŸ˜€ I made the decision to eat the pretzels even though I knew it’d put me over. I could have eaten popcorn for 1 point but it was too much food, I wanted a small snack that was 1 point but didn’t have any so the pretzels it was. I figured better this time around to go one over then one under. Let’s hope the gamble is right!

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