Archive | 11:23 pm

Milk, Men and Mayhem

24 Jan

I know that saying about not crying over spilled milk, everyone in the English speaking world knows that saying and I’m sure there are other versions for other languages lol but what about milk going sour overnight…is it ok to cry a little over that? or at least swear a bit?

I ask this because last night my milk was fine, this morning when I went to put some in my morning tea (well, ok, afternoon tea cause I slept in but still! it’s my first cup for the day and in my world that is practically sacred lol) it had gone bad. Ugh. When I opened the lid I got a whiff of that horrible smell nobody wants to experience but I tried to pretend I didn’t smell anything and poured some milk in to my tea…where it curdled. Double ugh. A lovely cup of tea wasted. Sadness.

I’ve never been able to understand how something seems to go instantly bad. Sure sure, I know it didn’t happen in an instant, it has sloooowly been going bad since it was packaged and shipped to the store but it feels like an instant process…is it only me that feels that way?

On a completely different note I would like the world to stop associating all of Canada with that annoying Bieber kid who is constantly embarrassing us and instead focus on these guys…

Canada's Mens Bobsled Team 2014

Canada’s Mens Bobsled Team 2014

These fine gentlemen are the Canadian Mens Bobsled Team for the 2014 Olympics. I now have a new sport to pay attention to lol πŸ˜‰ The guys posted this pic on one of their Twitter feeds, apparently they had to weigh in hence the lack of clothes, I wonder how much the beards weigh? I also wonder when bobsled athletes became so muscle-y, I always thought they were super skinny, like in the movie Cool Runnings (ya know, the movie about the Jamaican Bobsled Team competing in Calgary, AB, if you haven’t seen it you should, it’s a funny movie πŸ™‚ ) Not that I am complaining about the muscles, or the uh, skin show *blush*, just curious if the increased muscle mass has any adverse affect on speed or aerodynamics…and of course that curiosity is the sole reason I will be watching the bobsled races once the Olympics start…that sounds convincing…right? πŸ˜‰ teehee

The cat is causing mayhem this evening. He is in an especially hyper mood and chasing a stuffed ladybug all over the place. Keep in mind the toy doesn’t move on its own, he is chasing it because he is flinging it places, it’s really cute to watch lol. He flung it in to the air and it landed in a cloth bag that has various items in it, he couldn’t get it out because the sides of the bag are too high for him to reach to the bottom so he knocked the bag over but then couldn’t get the toy out because one of the items was squishing it. Watching him try to find a solution to this problem made me appreciate his cunning even more then I already do…it also made me wonder why he hasn’t killed me in my sleep yet because I’m certain he could lol. While in pursuit of his ladybug he has knocked over countless things and created havoc in my tiny apartment. I don’t reeeeally mind cause he doesn’t do this all the time and hey, it’s his home too right? Why shouldn’t he be allowed to go a little nutso sometimes? What sucks is he doesn’t clean up after himself, the spoiled brat lol, which means tomorrow I shall be cleaning his mess. I know I know, I should be cleaning the mess up now but it is just papers etc and I’m busy watching Criminal Minds before I go to bed lol Sleep first! Cleaning some other time! That’s a good order don’t ya think? πŸ˜‰

Nervous Nelly…Nellie?

24 Jan

I just changed my Gravatar pic on WordPress and it has me nervous, a stupid thing to be nervous about I know but there ya have it, nervous.

well ok, I'm not this nervous!

well ok, I’m not this nervous!

Why am I nervous? Cause now people can see what I look like! Ack!

Sure, I sometimes post pics that have partial shots of my face, and yeah ok, if you are even vaguely observant you can look to the right and see my face on the Twitter Widget and if you actually read my Twitter feed you will see the occasional picture of me where I’m not at all trying to hide my face buuuuut I dunno, this feels different…is that weird?

Now, when I leave comments it’ll be my picture beside the comment instead of my former Gravatar which was a purple fairy (I like fairies, don’t judge! that’s just mean πŸ˜› lol), if someone wants to see who I am on WordPress they will actually see what I look like…even though it was my decision it has me mildly freaking out which in turn is making me laugh at myself lol

Anyone tech savvy could have followed my blog to my LinkedIn account, my tumblr account (which is super new!), my facebook account, my twitter account, my google+ account…omg I have a lot of online stuff, what is scary is I know people who have waaay more! My point is, on some of those other accounts I haven’t been as cautious as I have been here when it comes to my image being attached, but because I write about my life, and personal stuff on here, I try to keep it a bit more anonymous.

Apparently I decided to change that a bit lol πŸ˜›

I’m probably nervous for nothing, most likely nobody will even notice it has changed, or care that it is a picture of me now, but for me it is kind of a big step in my being alright with people who aren’t personal friends knowing a bit more about who I am. I’m so judgmental about what I look like I didn’t want to offer up my image for judgement by others but for some reason, tonight (well, technically early this morning as it is 2:25am Friday but I haven’t gone to bed yet so to me it still feels like Thursday night lol) it feels like it is a good night to make this little change to my WordPress account.

So hi there all my WordPress friends! You now know what I look like…ack! πŸ˜›

Peering Over My Shoulder

24 Jan

Today is day two of my Food Journal and I am surprised at how much my food choices were affected by the knowledge someone was going to be reading (and judging!) my eating habits. Who’d of thunk it? lol

I wanted to eat pizza but didn’t because I didn’t want the trainer to read that I ate pizza, just like I didn’t eat a whole whack load of other things today because of the judgement that will be passed on my food choices.

It’s like Big Brother or George Orwell but in a smaller way. πŸ˜›

Normally I try to not let other peoples judgements of me affect my behaviour. I mean yeah ok, I know it does but I try to not let it affect me too too much. This time though, I am choosing to alter my behaviour because I know what I want to do is “bad” and having someone figuratively looking over my shoulder keeps me from indulging in the self -destructive behaviours that will do nothing good for me. It’s like having a little coach on my shoulder helping me to resist the foods I shouldn’t be eating. It’s so much easier to decide to not eat something when I know he will be reading my food journal on Wednesday.

Lately I’ve been eating foods I shouldn’t be, I’ve been eating foods in larger quantities than I should be and to top off those oh-so-lovely decisions I haven’t been exercising nearly as often as I should be. This has resulted in me feeling icky, slower than normal, fatter…even though I know my food choices are making me feel this way I can’t seem to stop my behaviour, or at least I wasn’t able to until today. Today though, when I thought about eating pizza, even though I wanted it, I kept thinking “nope cause he’ll read it”. Even though I know I shouldn’t be eating it, and normally that knowledge would be enough to stop me, lately knowing that isn’t enough, buuuut knowing someone else is going to know what I was eating was enough.

I don’t know why I am needing an outsider to help me have self-control over my food but I do and luckily for right now I have one, yay! πŸ˜€

Don’t think I managed to eat perfectly today, I didn’t, but I did manage to minimize the screw ups which is nice, lol. πŸ™‚

I didn’t make it to the gym but I did go for a nice walk to the grocery store which I am going to pretend counts as exercise lol I used my Runtastic App to track the walk there, paused it while I was shopping then restarted it on the walk home. I’m cranky with myself because I forgot to restart it right away so the info is a bit wrong because it didn’t track the entire walk home. What I have from it says I walked 3.16km and it took me 1:07:17. It is a pathetic distance and if I was going running or hiking I’d put my nose in the air at such a short distance but hey, I can’t control where the store is lol and I’d like to point out that the walk home had me carrying two fairly heavy grocery bags. Not like I didn’t know I was going to be buying food but I didn’t take in to account how heavy some of the items would be, especially when they are stuffed in to two bags lol

The walk home got me thinking about weight I have already lost. I don’t know the exact weight of the two bags but I know they weighed enough my arms were hurting from carrying them, the straps were digging in to my hands and my breathing became a bit laboured. Not hugely laboured, if I’d been walking with someone I’d have still been able to talk but I was breathing heavier and faster than normal. I made sure to walk the same pace I normally walk, even with the addition of the bags, hoping to turn the walk in to a bit more of a work out.

When I started breathing heavier I started thinking about the extra weight I was carrying, how at one point, not all that long ago that extra weight wouldn’t have been weight in a bag but weight that was on my body. I realized that if I was doing that walk a couple years ago I might have been breathing heavily not because I was holding something but just because my body was that much larger, and more out of shape then it is now, and if walking that distance/elevation would have made me out of breath just from walking how much worse would it have been if I was carrying my groceries back home? It’s an unsettling thought…

It’s easy to forget how far I have come, how much I have changed (for the better), how 3-4 years ago I would have been so happy at the thought of being how I am now. Because now, all I think about is how much farther I have to go and how I never seem to be able to get there. I think about how much I still want to change and how I seem to be at a level that asks more of me than I am able to give. I know I won’t get results without putting in the work, I know I won’t reach my dreams without making an effort, I know I have to do more than I am doing now to get where I want to be but in the day-to-day act of living I seem to forget the larger far-reaching goal and I focus on the in-the-moment gratification.

how far

A small sacrifice now will make for a happier future me. I used to know that deep in my bones, I didn’t even have to remind myself when offered something tempting because it was one of the mantras I lived, but lately, sigh, lately I don’t think that automatically, I don’t even remind myself when having to make a choice, I just say “screw it” to having impulse control and eat whatever – or at least that is how it feels to me.

It’s important to remember how far I have come while not letting go of the lessons I have learned along the way and using that knowledge to keep me on the path to a healthier, fitter, happier me. I guess sometimes I just need a kick in the butt to remember! πŸ˜›

 

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