Tag Archives: fat

Slackers R Us…er…Me

23 Jun

So I have been such a slacker the past couple days, I honestly don’t know what has gotten in to me! It’s weird…I had such a habit of exercising at least once a day and all it took was 6 days where I wasn’t able to exercise to break that habit and put me back on the path of lazy. Who knew it was so easy to break a habit? I suppose since it was a recently developed habit that made it easier to lose it…not like I’ve been active daily for years – perish the thought! lol. 😛

When I was in AB there was never time to exercise, I was always meeting up with someone, going somewhere, and my plan to do at least some ab work and free weights at night before I went to bed went right out the window when it turned out I wasn’t getting to bed until 2am or later. Who wants to do ab work after a full busy day at 2am before going to bed?? Not me!

So when I got back here I thought I’d jump right back in to my routine, food and exercise wise. Tuesday I went for my hike, did some free weights and ab work and felt like I was gonna die lol. One week of not exercising really put me back a bit and the trail kicked my butt! I had acting class that evening so I wasn’t able to go to boxerfit but that’s ok right cause I have the whole rest of the week! Well, Wednesday I had a coaching session at 12:30p which was just that tiny bit too early in the day so that I could go hiking in the morning and not be freaking out about being late so I figured I’d go afterwards but it didn’t happen. sigh. Instead I ended up eating pizza and dessert breadsticks and sitting on my couch! Stupid right? Right! Then today (Thursday) I again was up and out to be somewhere for 12:30p, this time though I was meeting friends for lunch downtown and I ate Beef Teriyaki on white rice, oh, and a miso soup. It was gooooood! And yet, so baaaaaaad! lol. 😛 When I got home I was all heavy feeling from digesting so I thought I’d go hiking a bit later in the day but the feeling never went away and that combined with the chilly wind was a built in easy excuse for not going out again. Lazeeeeeeeeeeeee! Since that lunch I have eaten cookies, some toast with some whipped peanut butter on it, um, hmm, that’s it.

Not the most brilliant of food choices over the past couple days! *rolls eyes*

I keep eating large bad for me meals, feeling gross cause I am overly full and then barely (or not at all) eating the rest of the day cause I feel all icky. sigh. And cause I feel icky I am not exercising. What a stupid cycle I have gotten myself in!

I decided to change up my routine in the hopes of forcing myself out of this rut before it becomes a really bad rut so I booked a nanny job for tomorrow starting at 11am for 6 hours. This means I don’t have the whole day to exercise, I’ll have to force it in somewhere and for some reason I always seem to get more done in a day when I have more to do, if I don’t have a lot to do it’s easier to slack and next thing you know I’ve done nothing. Weird huh?

Also, since I will be away from my kitchen but not near a restaurant I will only be able to eat the food I take with me and if I only take healthy food well, guess I’ll be eating healthy tomorrow. lol. See how this just might work?

Now all I can hope for is nice weather tomorrow so when the nanny job is over I can hike…or have almost no traffic on the roads so I can make it to boxerfit on time…I’ll be happy with either. 🙂

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My Skinny Wrists

22 Jun

I don’t know if this is the same for you but my body didn’t get fat all over at the same rate, certain areas got fatter faster then others. This means that other areas stayed thinner longer then others and made it easier to trick myself in to thinking I hadn’t gotten that fat.

My arms have always been thin, when I was closer to being in shape (many many moons ago!) I never worked my arms out at the gym cause sure they didn’t have any great toning going on but they were skinny and that was all that mattered to me. My arms were also what made me realize I had gotten fat – I mean sure, I knew my clothing sizes had gone up an up an up and sure I knew I didn’t like how I looked and was uncomfie with people looking at me or wearing anything even slightly revealing or dressy up cause I felt it was wrong to bring attention to such an unattractive body but I still managed to delude myself into thinking it hadn’t gotten that bad – until I saw some pictures of my arms! ack!

Because my arms had always been thin if I dressed up in any way it was almost always with a spaghetti strapped or at least sleeveless top because I figured I might as well show off the one and only thin part of me, lol *rolls eyes* Then, it happened, dun dun dun, I saw some pictures where I was dressed up (in a spaghetti strapped empire waisted top) and my arms were freakin huuuuge! HUGE! And to make it worse because I am so crazy pale my big fat arms looks liked beached whales! When those pictures got put up on facebook I was horrified when I saw them. I couldn’t believe I had gone out in public like that, dressed like that!

What was worse was I couldn’t believe my arms had gotten fat – my one remaining thin body part! How had I not noticed they were ballooning out of the stratosphere? Oy! *rolls eyes*

I’d like to say that was the immediate turning point in my life and from there on out I was walking the Healthy Lifestyle route but it wasn’t, I kept on with my poor eating habits and no exercise for a while after that and my arms (and every other body part) kept getting bigger. shrug.

Well, now that I am losing weight it seems my arms are losing weight faster then the rest of me…I guess I should have expected that, *confused face*, but I am not exactly sure why I should have expected that…just, now that it happened it seems to make sense, lol, that doesn’t make any sense does it? 😛

Through all of this my wrists have stayed small, like uber small, I can’t wear bracelets because they fall off my hand they are that small. I always thought my small wrists on my fat body looked so odd – like they were a sign of how I was supposed to look but couldn’t quite manage. I kinda hated my wrists cause for a long time it has felt they like were taunting me, which yes, I am aware that sounds stupid but whatever, this is my blog! lol. 😉 Now my upper arms are getting not only thinner but more toned (thank you Dragon Boating! lol) and my thin wrists are no longer a taunting body part but part of a body part that is once again something I am sorta comfy showing off. 🙂

I say sorta comfy cause I still feel like I did at the beginning of this weight loss journey which means I still feel self conscious about my body and uncomfy showing it off and just as fat as I was back then…I know that I have lost 32 pounds but that is intellectual knowing, not deep in my body knowing. I keep thinking that once I lose all my excess weight all my body image issues will be solved but I think that theory might be wrong…I know! Shocking that I might be wrong! lol. 😛

If I am not already comfy showing off my upper arms when they are much smaller and more toned then they have been in a long time how will I be comfie and confident with my new body once it is finally revealed – uh, I mean revealed as in a sculpture that finally emerges from the hunk of marble not revealed like I am gonna strip my clothes off and show it to people lol. 😛

It is a new problem to ponder and I don’t yet have anything resembling an answer but perhaps as I continue to lose weight the answer will come to me, and if it does I will be sure to share it with you! 🙂

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Today I Became a Mom?

19 Jun

haha, ok, not a real mom – don’t go freaking out that I kept something huge like that a secret, I became a GodMother…only I think that makes me sound old so I prefer GodMom…or Auntie. 😛 I am not an overly religious person and really, neither are most of my friends but it seems once you pop out a kid or two you become more religious, shrug.

A friend of mine, JF, is a mom of 3 kids, the oldest is 3.5 years old. She asked me to be godmother to her youngest (who is not yet a year old) and I was floored; in a good way! I couldn’t believe someone would ask that of me…the weird slightly crazy friend who has not gotten married, not become successful in her career, has not popped out a kid or two…basically, I am the one who didn’t follow the same road map as everybody else and while people don’t overly judge me for that they do wonder when I am going to “grow up”. *rolls eyes* I think sometimes they also live vicareously through me cause while JF is going insane on a rainy sat when the kids are cooped up inside and she can’t get anything done I am giving myself a “pampering day” and indulging in mani/pedis and sitting quietly on my couch with a cup of tea and a book. lol. We have quite the opposite lives. 🙂

In case you’re wondering – I quite enjoy my life and would pick mine over hers anyday. 😀 lol

So here I am in AB, becoming a godmom to an adorable little girl and wondering when did this happen? JF told me ages ago, after her second child, she’d only ever ask family to be godparents because for her first child she asked her best friend to be godmom and the friend said yes but since then she hardly ever sees JF or her goddaughter and they live in the same city! JF’s oldest, LF, knows me better then her own godmom and sees me more often – faintly ridiculous when you think about how I live a 12 hour drive away. 😛 So when JF asked me I was stunned, never did I expect that. She said she realized she can’t limit godparent status to just blood family, it has to be asked of people she is close to and people she thinks of like family – kinda cool, she thinks of me like family. *sappy smile*

How does all this relate to my overarching theme of weight loss? Well, when I come to AB to visit my eating habits gets all screwed up. It is so easy to follow your points plan and eat the “right” foods when at home and in your normal routine – it’s a lot harder when you are out all day for days in a row and everyone wants to see you and hang out with you and they all suggest going out for food. Seriously, all of them!

I got here wed super late at night, on thursday I went for brunch with my mom to this great place where I didn’t eat too too badly and then the rest of the day wasn’t so bad food wise. But after that it went downhill. lol. Friday I had lunch at Red Lobster, YUM, and then had dinner at The Cheesecake Cafe, YUM again. 🙂 My only saving grace is at Red Lobster I got the lunch sized portion and at Cheesecake I only ate half the sandwich and half the fries, the rest came home to sit in my mom’s fridge, lol, however, MJ and I split the most amazing desert at Cheesecake (no, it wasn’t cheesecake lol) so that shot my points way in to the stratoshphere. lol. 😛 Saturday we had a family lunch and I didn’t make the best choices, shrug, that’s totally my fault, there were healthy foods on the table but I went for the not so great foods, oops. Then I went to a movie with my oldest nephew where I was thankfully too full to want popcorn or other junkfood but after that I went back to my parents where I ate a small but not awesomly healthy dinner (I had leftovers from lunch lol) then I went out with HB and she hadn’t eaten so we went to a restaurant where I got some slushy alcoholic thing that tasted really good, so good I had two of them, eek! and I had a fruit crumble desert. *groan*

I can feel myself getting fatter. *rolls eyes*

Today, Sunday, was the baptism so after the ceremony there was a party at JF’s mom’s house so I had half a croissant sandwich, raw veggies, cut up fresh fruit, about 10 shrimp with a very small amount of dipping sauce. Not so bad right? I mean, sure, the croissant isn’t good for me but I only had half so it could’ve been worse…well…it got worse! There were cupcakes for dessert, oh my! They were so prettily decorated with cream cheese icing, sooooo yum! 😀 I had 2.5 cupcakes – yup, that’s right, two and a half cupcakes, in under 4 hours! Ack!!

All this food is bad enough but I am always out doing stuff and haven’t exercised once! I brought my free weights and my yoga matt thinking every night before I went to bed I’d at least do something…nope. I am not getting to bed until 3am or so and by that time the last thing I want to do is a bunch of sit ups. ugh.

This is what I have come to expect when I visit – lots of food, lots of bad food choices, me going back with a couple extra pounds on me but this time it is bothering me way more then normal cause I am filming on Tuesday and I don’t want to feel fat on screen. An extra 2 pounds or so won’t show on screen so I’m not worried about how I will look – my concern is I will feel heavy in my tummy area and extra jiggly (both of which I am already feeling) and that will make me self conscious and affect my acting – which sucks. For me, I have to feel comfortable in my body for my acting to be good, if I am not comfie I don’t move as much and I look stuck in one spot, it’s highly annoying. If I feel heavy and fat then I won’t be moving around so much and it’ll affect my demo reel. Argh!

My only way to fix this, that I can think of, is to start right now with being stricter. I figure it’s a better late then never approach lol. I am still way full from the party after the baptism so when I do eat it will be small and healthy and then tomorrow while driving back to BC I will hafta be careful with what I choose. For in the car I have veggies and fruit, just like on my drive up, so I’m not too worried about that. I find though, that the last 2-3 hours of the drive are the hardest and I make it through by using caffeine, water and processed sugar. lol. That’s why I always have timbits on the car, for the last couple hours. But not tomorrow! Nuh-uh! Fruit! Natural sugar! Water! Veggies! Only healthy food is going in me so hopefully I won’t feel heavy on tuesday when I am filming…*scared face*…wish me luck!

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My Dragon Boating Weekend

13 Jun

Oooooh man, what a weekend! 😀 The 11th and 12th were the Dragon Boating Festival and for the first time I was a part of it. I can’t wait for next year!

Lemme tell ya, dragon boaters are their own special breed, lol. They work hard and they party harder – which is sweeeeet!

Both sat and sun KL and I (well, our whole team as well as other teams) had to be at the Paddler’s Village way early in the morning, on sat we were there at 7:30am and sun we got to sleep in and didn’t have to be there until 8:15am, oooooh, soooo late! 😉 hehe. We were there until 4:30pm or so on the sat, we could have stayed later cause the races weren’t all done for the day but we were finished with our races and we wanted to come chill at my place (she stayed the night), sunday we didn’t leave till after the paddler’s party in the evening so I got home about 12:45am…a looooong day! 😛

Keeping in mind this was our teams first time racing and we had only practiced together as a team 4 times so don’t expect this post to be a story of how we won a medal, lol, cause we so didn’t! We came in 88th out of 100 teams – my competitive side wants to say that totally blows and how embarassing but the realistic side of me says we could have done worse and hey, we were the least trained team there so at least we beat some teams! 😀

I’ve never been involved in a competitive sport like this before, where you go and compete against other teams from around the world and when you’re not on the water competing every team is friendly with each other because it’s this small community, shrug, it was weird but nice. Heck, even when on the water the teams are friendly towards each other, well, before and after the actual race, during the race you’re so focused on your boat you don’t even have time to look at the other boats let alone think of them. lol.

The weather on sat was cloudy but warm, the sun didn’t really come out until a bit before our second race, so around 2pm or so? I put sun screen on but sadly, I missed a couple spots near my hairline and just above my eyebrows so I got burned, sigh. That wouldn’t be sooooo bad but sunday was bright and sunny but coolish (figures! lol) and even though I had sunscreen slathered on all frickin day I burned! Totally ended up with racoon eyes, ow! What’s worse of all though is my freckles are darker, grr! I tried to be careful with my arms cause our team shirts had regular t-shirt length sleeves so I didn’t want part of my arms to be darker then the rest (by darker I of course mean the freckles are darker, not the actual skin, once the red fades from a burn it goes back to it’s normal uber pale colour). I almost managed it…almost…today I noticed in the mirror that the freckles below the sleeve line are darker, sigh, but hopefully if I keep them covered the rest of the summer they will go pale again quickly. Man I hate the sun. *rolls eyes*

Sunday night was the Paddler’s Party in the beer gardens, the ticket covered the price of 2 beers so everyone was drinking! Even though the beers were $5 each that didn’t stop people from goin crazeeee, oh, there was wine as well but nobody was drinking that, lol. So the beer was flowing, people are yapping away, then the bongs came out, yup, bongs. Two seperate teams brought them, one was a standard looking bong, the other had 3 spouts so 3 people at one time could chug – I’ve never seen that before, quite the contraption. 😛 I did not do the bong, it’s not my thing and besides, I was only drinking a tiny bit since I was gonna hafta drive later, lame but oh well, KL however was not driving later and she was already quite drunk by the time the bongs were pulled out so she decided she wanted to do one. lol. I of course, being the good friend that I am, took pictures that I am going to post on facebook. teehee.

Everyone had a killer time at the party, and sure, part of that was the beer, but a big part was just the comraderie of a group of people who may be completely different from each other in all kinds of ways but they have one awesome thing in common and that has brought them together for a weekend of fun. 😀

I woke up this morning feeling like death and all I wanted to do was sleep some more, lol, 4 races in 2 days is a lot for muscles that aren’t that used to it yet – plus the dancing at the party used all kinds of muscles cause lemme say, the dancing was not the tame kind at all! Oh yea, the party had a dj, sorry, forgot to mention that. Plus, my throat was way sore from all the yelling etc but it was all worth it and I’d do it again in a heartbeat! I’ll actually be doing it all again, but on a smaller scale, in about 10 weeks, yah! 😀

My food was not all that great this weekend – it started off ok and then tanked. KL is a great friend but a horrible food influence, sigh. Sat I had oatmeal for breakfast, but after that KL and I ended up at a pancake breakfast fundraiser (a team is trying to get the funds to go to a race in San Francisco) so I ate 3 pancakes, I didn’t really have lunch but I did snack on some grapes and had a small soft serve ice cream cone in a waffle cone with a half sized flake chocolate stuck in it – yum! I drank water all day so that’s all good at least. Now that may not seem so bad but after we left the racing area we decided to get dinner and neither of us had the energy to cook so we ordered food from White Spot, man I love that restaurant. I got a bbq burger with cheese, it came with yam fries, coleslaw and a root beer. Oh my. Then Sunday, started off with a Hearty Medley’s, I resisted the pancakes but we ate lunch on Sunday at the village and sadly, there were no healthy options, shrug. I did my best, got a wrap with taco style ground beef in it, lettuce, grilled veggies, salsa, little bit of shredded cheese and sour cream – way delish! Then later an even smaller ice cream then the day before, um, a bunch of beer, and then when trying to minimize the effects of the beer 2 apricots, a peach, a granola bar, a heck of a lot of water…and then KL and I (again) bought dinner, we went to this place she swears has the best burgers in the world, and it’s true, they are awesome but oh man, two burgers in two days? My tummy may never forgive me for this, *shakes head*. It was huuuuuge! And had crispy onion strings on it and cheese, oy, oh and of course it came with fries! lol. I couldn’t finish the burger but I ate almost all of it and had some of the fries, sigh. Way tasty but I told her it was so bad for me (the whole menu is horrible, it’s the only menu I’ve seen that doesn’t even attempt to have something healthy on it!) I would only eat there at most 2 times a year – cause, dude, that just so doesn’t fit in to my points! lol.

Today I was back to basics. I didn’t exercise due to scheduling issues but I am at 19.5 points for the day and not even tempted to snack on something to eat that extra half point – I think I may still be digesting from last nights dinner! hehe.

I’ll be hiking for sure tomorrow and then going to acting class in the evening – wednesday I will be driving to Alberta so no exercise that day and who knows what will happen food wise – I am hoping I’ll manage to eat fairly healthy cause I hafta be super good this week to make up for the weekend, *scared face* I finally managed to lose that weight I managed to put on when I was in Alberta over Easter (and just after Easter) and what do I do? I eat like a maniac over the course of 2 days and probably gained it all back. sigh.

The weekend was such a great time – who would have thought I’d enjoy it so much? Looks like I am becoming an active person after all…if that can happen, well, anything can! 😛

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Spic an Span

10 Jun

Today was a cleaning day – ugh. I hate cleaning, I hate the smells of the cleaning products, I hate how they affect my skin, I hate the effort I have to put in to make the place clean – there is nothing about cleaning that I like. Sure, I like the place being clean but I’d be just as happy enjoying the clean apartment but having someone else doing the cleaning. lol.

I’d like to say I don’t know anybody who likes cleaning but sadly, I do know one of those crazy people who like to clean. *rolls eyes* How the two of us are such good friends is baffling – well, ok, not really, we have lots of other stuff in common, but seriously? She likes to clean? That is so…wrong!

Why did I have such a big clean fest today? Lots of reasons! (1) neither my roomie nor I are all that enamored with cleaning so we tend to let it slide (2) I’m going away next week and I like to leave the place clean – usually because I like coming back to the place being clean but there are no guarantees about that when you have a roomie, sigh (3) my friend who likes to clean is staying the night tomorrow and there is no way in hell I could let her see how messy it got (4) I wanted to take a day off from formal exercising because the dragon boating festival is this weekend so I’ll be racing a lot both sat and sun and thought I should give my body a bit of a break but I still wanted to do something vaguely active, shrug.

Yes, you read that last reason right – even though I was giving myself a day off from exercising I still wanted to be active – I am slowly becoming “that person” – the person I have always mocked and sneered at – oh how we change, sigh. lol.

I am psyched for the festival this weekend – my team has two races each day and I am fairly certain we will lose each race. lol. This is not uber negative thinking, it’s factual, we have only been a team for 5 weeks and only get to practice together once a week – that’s not enough time to take a bunch of newbies and have them become a perfectly timed team. shrug. You should see the pro teams, they are amazing to watch. They are perfectly in sync, they can go crazy fast, you don’t want to look away when they are rowing cause they are truly captivating. If you youtube Dragon Boat Racing you’ll find lots of videos you can watch, if you watch a good team you will see what I mean. 🙂

I won’t get to weigh in like normal on sat or sun because I have to be at the racer’s village at 7:30 am – disgusting! So I weighed myself today and I lost, wOOt! I am not going to make the amount lost official until monday though when I will re-weigh in and see how that number compares.

Today I ate:

1/2 bagel = 2.5 points

1/2 tbls whipped peanut butter = 1 point

1 banana = 1 point

29g Special K = 2 point

1/4 C 1% milk = 1 point

1 apple = 1 point

1/2 pckg frozen stir fry veggies = 0 points

1 C brown rice = 4 points

1 pckg Stir Fry Tofu and Sauce = 8 points

1 Skinny Cow ice cream sandwich = 2 points

Total points eaten = 22

Exercise points earned = 9

I found by accident when grocery shopping this package of tofu and sauce meant to be put with veggies to make a stir fry. I guess it’s the lazy man’s way of making stir fry? I figured I’d give it a try. The tofu and sauce package contains two servings so normally I would have made it all but only eaten half but I won’t have a chance to eat left overs until monday and I wasn’t sure it would really last that long…tofu confuses me, shrug. Also, I was freakishly hungry, it was almost 9pm and I hadn’t had dinner yet so I figured meh, eat it all, it’s all good. lol. It was tasty but I won’t buy it again. I mean come on, it’s not that hard to throw in some meat or tofu of your own and toss some sauce from you fridge in the wok too – right? Maybe it’s cause I was making my own stir fry before trying this package thing – so I already know making it from scratch is stupid easy, I mean, if I can make it and have it taste good then anybody can lol. 😛

Now, the exercise points, I wasn’t sure what to do with that, I mean, I didn’t break a sweat and I didn’t do any traditional work out stuff so part of me feels like I didn’t work out but I was active for 4.5 hours and if I hadn’t been cleaning I would have just been sitting on the couch (or something similar) so maybe cleaning should count as activity? I decided it counts as Low Intensity Activity and wow, low intensity for 4.5 hours sure does add up in exercise points! lol. Yah! Oh, and don’t go thinking I was just doing a bit of dusting, I was scrubbing, moving furniture and my fridge and stove, stretching up to reach the high places – I cleaned it all! That is also why I feel it should count as activity – I moved furniture! That deserves something! lol. 🙂

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Twice In One Day??

8 Jun

My poor abused body – all my leg muscles are shaking mildly and the mere thought of getting up off the couch to go get a fresh cup of tea makes me whimper. lol. Today I did the unknown – I exercised…Twice! Two times in one day! I don’t know if hell has frozen over or if it was a miracle but I somehow managed to get my lazy arse off the couch and moving on 2 seperate occaisions today. *groan* I have a feeling I am so gonna be hurting tomorrow…but hey, who cares? That’s tomorrow! lol

I had wanted to do this crazy exercise-twice-in-one-day-thing on Monday but it didn’t work out so instead my first try at this was today. Freakishly enough, I just may do this again…maybe…we’ll see how I feel tomorrow lol.

I brought my mom and dad with me when I went hiking today, by this I mean my mom called me right as I was lacing up my runners and if I didn’t go hiking right at that specific time I wouldn’t be able to do it at all so I took my phone with me – something I never do! My hiking time is “my time”, I listen to my iPod, cringe whenever I come in to contact with nature, and basically take the time to focus on me, shrug. Somedays there isn’t much to focus on, lol, so I just enjoy the music, but some days you need some time to sort things out in your head, plan something that is coming up, figure out how you are gonna deal with something or say/write something. shrug. But yeah, so my poor parents had to hear me huffing and puffing while we were talking, it probably sounded like I was hiking to my death lol.

But I survived and had a yummy meal of salmon, mashed yam and mixed veggies while resting and reminding myself I wanted to exercise twice in one day, it was a goal, it would not kill me – probably. 😉

On my way to Boxerfit I stopped and picked up the parcel my cousin sent me from England, that boy, he’s so awesome! I got a box of Bristows Clotted Cream Fudge, a chocolate bar that is currently in the fridge (and if you think I’m getting up to read the name of it and pissing off my muscles you got another thing comin! lol) and a pair of socks with the Union Jack. The fudge has a picture of Will and Kate because it is a commemorate box of fudge for the wedding 🙂 I love it!

I had to leave earlier then normal for boxerfit because of having to make it to the post office before it closed so once I got to the gym I had about 45 minutes to kill which was perfect cause I had taken the sides for the second scene I want to do for my demo reel and I worked on the lines while waiting for 7pm to roll around. It’s nice to know you can practice your lines without someone overhearing you – at least for me, shrug.

I’m fairly certain the guy who runs the Boxerfit class is trying to kill me, well, not just me, all of us. lol. Todays class he had us doing these running drills, you run as fast as you can from spot A to spot B, at spot B you do 5 push ups, then you run back to A and do 5 full sit ups, then you run back to spot B and do 5 squats, then you run back to spot A and do 5 burpees. You’d think that was bad enough but then you had to do it all over again only do 4 of each, then again but 3 of everything…I’m sure you’ve figured out the pattern here…see what I mean about trying to kill us? *rolls eyes* He timed us and is gonna make us do it all over again in a month and apparently we will all have faster times…he’s nuts! This was on top of all our normal stuff so by the end of the class I was soaked in sweat, yeah I know, gross right? When I got in to my suv to drive home I really felt how wet my clothes were, ugh, I made sure to sit upright the whole drive home cause I didn’t want the sweat to soak in to the fabric of the seat. lol.

I have a job interview tomorrow morning for a law firm, can you get less artistic? lol. It’s at 10am which seems early to me cause I have been sleeping in almost everyday but I suppose it’s an ok time cause after that is done I will be running some errands and hopefully getting home by about 1pm – that’ll give me time to hike before meeting up with KL for our final Dragon Boat training session before the festival this weekend.

Oh what an active week this has been!

I have eaten 19 points today, and earned a crazy high number of exercise points – 14 of them! A record for me. 🙂 Sooo, since I have so many exercise points I am about to eat a Skinny Cow ice cream sandwich (2 points) which will have me eating a whopping 1 exercise point. Not so bad that! 😀

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Tuesdays Are Now My Fave Day!

7 Jun

Wow, I loved today. 😀 I wish I could wake up tomorrow and it would be today again just so I could relive it! Extreme? Maybe. Do I care? Nope. lol.

It’s not like the day started off amazing or anything, I had to be up a bit earlier then normal cause I had a first stage job interview conducted over the phone. So there I was, up and fed reading a book when the call came through, it took a bit over an hour and I think it went well. shrug. I’m not all that excited about the job (aka, I don’t think I really want it but am going through with the interviewing process just because lol) but even though I don’t want the job doesn’t mean I wanted to totally tank the interview, it’s good to know that the interview went well. 🙂

Then I hiked, did some free weights, ab work and stretching – I’m sure you’ll all be super duper excited to hear my sit ups are getting easier to accomplish, lol. That was sarcasm, in case you couldn’t tell, lol, it’s sometimes hard to tell when it’s in writing… I still can’t do a lot of them, weak core muscles, sigh, but I did 20 full sit ups and 20 angled ones (you know, the kind where you only go up as high as the bottom of your shoulder blades and angle so your right hand touches your left knee and your left hand to your right knee). I feel the angle ones more which I am surprised at but I struggle more with the full sit ups…oh, and did you know if you drink water before you start your sit ups you can hear the water jiggle around in your tummy each time you go up and down? It’s true, it’s happened to me 3 times in 4 days, lol.

After exercising, which while I hate exercising I have to admit it does leave me feeling good about myself, arg, I ate a yummy meal which I’m not sure if I should classify it as late lunch or early dinner…I think early dinner. The reason I had to eat an early dinner? Acting Class! wOOt! 😀 I wanted to make sure I was fed early enough before class I wouldn’t be making any digesting noises during class, or feeling really full, but I couldn’t eat so early I’d get hungry in class…a fine line! lol.

Acting Class rocked! Totally, absolutely, 100% ROCKED! 😀 😀 😀 Can you tell I’m excited? lol. This is why I love tuesdays – cause I have acting class. 😀

I worked on one of my scenes for my demo reel, I need two. I was worried about my choice of scene, I’m used to working on really deep/emotional/disturbing scenes, I love those scenes don’t get me wrong, I’m really good at them and there is such a sense of accomplishment when you finally get a hard scene nailed down but this scene is a comedy, more light hearted, and I was stressing it would be considered too, um, not flighty, uh…shallow? That’s the best word I can think of right now. Well, I was wrong, and soooo happy about that! How often is a person happy they are wrong? lol

The scene went great, I got some awesome tips and suggestions from the teacher (who I totally trust about this), the feedback from the other students was helpful, and…I found out my eyes aren’t too big! 😀

Ok, I can see your faces now, the confused look, the “huh?” noise you’re quietly making, you don’t know what I look like so you don’t know what I am talking about. Lemme try to explain, my eyes are really big, you know how Julia Roberts has a huge smile that overshadows the rest of her face? That’s my eyes. shrug. I don’t mind too too much, I usually play up my eye makeup and downplay the lips and cheeks cause if I have a feature I might as well use it right? The only problem is that’s all people notice when they look at me, especially when they are seeing me on screen, I have been told by acting teachers in the past to never roll my eyes on camera, not blink so often…all kinds of stuff cause it draws too much attention to my eyes. Do you know how hard it is to control your blinking?? I finally got myself out of the habit of rolling my eyes on screen, now, none of the characters I ever play rolls their eyes which is a little sad imo but oh well.

So today, the teacher brought up my eyes, made a comment about them which opened the floodgates for all the other students and the comments went like this “I am always staring at your eyes”, “I can’t look away from your eyes” etc etc. Not negative comments but all the comments were about how large my eyes are, how that’s all they noticed, blah blah blah. lol. Not like I don’t like compliments but I don’t feel like these are compliments, I felt like they are warnings, red flags being waved! Ack, be careful it’s the girl with the too large of eyes! 😛 I made a comment back about how my eyes are too large and mentioned how JB (the teacher from the past) gave me a list of rules about my eyes, like never rolling them, because the movement becomes too large on screen and RH (the current teachers) response was this: “Bull Shit! I call bull shit on JB!” 😀 How great was that?!?! *giggle* RH and all the other students agreed that my eyes aren’t too large, yes they draw attention but it’s just a matter of learning how to use my eyes and not let them take over the scene – that I can do! 😀

So, not only did I get some great help for my scene and am that much closer to being ready to film my demo reel I feel better about myself because some self consciousness I was feeling (and not really aware of) in regards to my eyes has been soothed. shrug. May seem silly, that all it took was one teacher and 4 students to all agree about my eyes not being too large to help me feel better but hey, I’m a shallow creature and I get my self worth from others (in some ways, not all my self worth cause that’d just be crazeee! lol).

After getting home from class I found in the mail room a door hanging thingy for me saying I have a parcel waiting for me at the nearest Canada Post office, it’s from my cousin DA in England and I am psyched because it contains what will be super yummy junk food that I can’t get here. lol. Yeah, I know, junk food? I can’t eat that! But it’s English junk food, it’s special. 😉

So, that’s my day, the day that I loved and wish I could repeat cause I loved it so much. Oh, and bonus, I earned 8 exercise points today and only ate in total 21 points, so, I only ate 1 exercise point. 🙂 I love when I don’t eat them all. lol. I’m tired from my hike earlier, being up earlier then what I am used to, and the decline of my adrenaline (always happens after acting) so I am gonna go to bed which means I won’t even cave and eat something else thereby eating more of my exercise points. Score! 😀

Oh, fyi, I didn’t put my food list today because this post is long enough but I had a stuffed Ricotta and Spinach chicken breast for my early dinner from M&M’s Meat Shop that was freaky good and only 3 points. Yum! I’ll talk more food stuff tomorrow.

Boy, I sure hope Wednesday brings something awesome with it cause it’ll take a lot to surpass today. 😀

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I Linked Up

6 Jun

How many of you have a LinkedIn account? The first time I got an invite (ages an ages ago) I ignored it thinking it was just the newest replacement for facebook and since I had enough trouble finding time to get on facebook what did I need another version of that for? lol. Since that first invite I received many more invites and I eventually decided to check it out – it’s like facebook, but not really. It’s like the business version: a PC instead of a Mac, a Blackberry instead of an iPhone, a Jeep instead of a Volvo…you getting my drift here? 😛

It’s a place to build an account about yourself and hopefully link up with others in your profession – find contacts, find job opportunities, find people you used to work with or go to school with – a lot of my acting buddies were building their LinkedIn accounts so I figured I’d better do the same, can’t be left in the dust an all that.

Well, I started my profile and then did nothing with it, I didn’t make the complete profile because of a variety of reasons but then last night I decided to go on and remedy that. shrug. I even went so far as to put the link to this blog on my LinkedIn account – this may not seem like a big deal but only very select people have been told about my blog, friends I am sure will be supportive and not make fun or comment to me all the time about what I write about. Oh, and I told my mom. 🙂

I feel like I have opened a window into who I am by putting the link to this blog on my LinkedIn account – it’s doubtful anyone who checks out my profile on LinkedIn will bother with checking out this blog but it’s possible, right? So now I must ponder, do I bow to the self-imposed pressure I am sure to start feeling to make each post quirky, fun, entertaining and always positive so if a perspective agent comes a-looking I am seen in the best light or do I continue to post about what I want in whatever mood I want and continue using this blog as a way to hold myself accountable in terms of my weight loss?

I vote for the second option! 😀

I got a call from the placement agency this morning and I have a phone job interview tomorrow at noon for that office job, sigh. I had almost come to terms with the idea I wasn’t going to take the interview, I know I don’t want to work in an office so why bother with the interview? and yet, I need a job if I want to keep paying for acting classes and dragon boating and all the other fun things I do…Why oh why couldn’t the interview have taken longer to set up? Like, maybe 3 weeks or so…ya know, after I (hopefully) have an agent, sigh. I feel like I am being pushed and I hate that!

Today I ate:

29 g Special K = 2 points

1/4 C 1% milk = 0.5 points

1/2 tbls whipped peanut butter = 1 point

1/2 bagel = 2.5 points

1 banana = 1 point

1 pizza crust = 5 points

30 g shredded cheese = 2 points

10 slices turkey pepperoni = 1 point

mushrooms = 0 points

5 baby potatoes = 1 point

1 tsp marg = 1 point

1 Skinny Cow ice cream sandwich = 2 points

40 g Junior Mints = 3 point

Total Points Eaten = 23

Exercise Points Earned = 7

So I have eaten 3 of my exercise points and all of my daily points – not so bad.  🙂 I have a nectarine all washed and sitting beside me which I have every intention of eating so that means I will have eaten 4 of my exercise points but that’s ok, that still leaves 3 of then un-eaten.

I had planned to exercise twice today, disgusting right? lol. I went for my hike earlier today and was supposed to go to boxerfit this evening but the errands I had to run took longer then expected so it was too late once I got home to be able to get to the class in time. Well, technically, the errands didn’t take longer then expected, the driving in between locations for the errands took longer then expected – helluva lot of traffic on the roads today! Don’t these people work? lol. I’m amazed how many people are not at work during the regular business hours of a monday…I’m curious about every single one of them, are they unemployed? independantly wealthy? taking a “sick day”? tourists? what?? how do all these people not have to be at work?

I won’t be able to go to boxerfit tomorrow cause I will be in acting class and oh man am I happy about that! I’ve been waiting all week to go back! 😀 I’m more then ok with not going to boxerfit if I can go work on my acting, lol. I will still hike tomorrow, and do my free weights and ab stuff so not like I will be totally slacking on my fitness.  🙂 and you know what, the time I saved by not going to boxerfit tonight I am putting towards working on my audition scene for tomorrow so really, maybe not making it to class tonight is for the best. 🙂

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What Happened There??

4 Jun

Oh my, the scale was not my friend today, sigh. 😦 I wasn’t sure how I felt going in to my weigh in, normally I have a feeling for if I gained or lost but this week, shrug, nuthin. I knew that I had eaten well and used almost none of my flex points so that is great, I also knew that my plan to exercise 3 times during the week didn’t work out and I’d only exercised twice so not so great. I was hoping (obviously) to go down but wouldn’t of been too surprised if I stayed the same. Actually, that’s a lie, I would have been very surprised to stay the same cause I followed the eating rules this past week so even if my exercising was less often then I wanted theoretically I still should have lost something.

Apparently my thinking is flawed cause I went up by 1.2 pounds. Yup, up. Sucky or what??

I’m not sure what I did wrong…I went over my food journal to see if I screwed up somewhere and as far as I am concerned I did just fine. Sure I used some flex points on Thursday, and yeah ok I ate dinner at a friend’s house on Wednesday so am unable to calculate my points for that meal but I made sure before I went to eat lightly throughout the day so I’d have more points then normal left for dinner. Since dinner that night was a small piece of chicken and an eyeballed (by me) portion of pasta with a tomato based sauce, oh and salad, I didn’t think I did that badly…maybe it was worse then I thought? And sure I ate all my exercise points on Tuesday but hey, that’s allowed! sigh, and fine, I went out for dinner on Friday after Dragon Boating so I most likely ate all my exercise points then too…ok fine! So my week wasn’t as great as I like to think it was – damn tracking my food and exercise, sigh, makes it harder to lie to myself lol. 😛

I had planned a pure lazy day for today, it is Saturday after all, lol, but once I saw the scale that went out the window and I immediately got dressed for a hike. The scale scared me in to exercising! *rolls eyes*

You know those women that go exercising and they look perfect? Their hair is styled, their makeup is perfect, their clothes are properly fitted and nice looking and even though they are exercising they don’t seem to be sweating and they don’t go red in the face? Yeah…that’s so not me! When I went hiking I was wearing black too large for me exercise pants, a tshirt that was under a long sleeved high necked exercise jacket with my hair yanked back in a messy ponytail, no makeup, sunglasses, ear buds in place and my exposed skin (which is only my face, ears, part of my neck and my fingers from the middle knuckle down) coated in sunscreen. Not fashionable at all! lol.

I am more concerned with preventing sun exposure then with what I look like, lol, which normally doesn’t matter cause the hiking trail doesn’t usually have a lot of people on it when I am on it but it was a beautiful sunny Saturday afternoon so the whole city seemed to be using the trail today. lol. I really pushed myself and by the end my poor legs were hurting, which seems kinda poetic cause they now match the pain in my lower back and arms from Dragon Boating yesterday. Ah the pain of getting in shape! 😛

Today I ate:

1/2 bagel = 2.5 points

1/2 tbls whipped peanut butter = 1 point

1 banana = 1 point

29 grams Special K = 2 points

1/2 C 1% milk = 1 point

2 C Campbell’s Rustic Spiced Lentil and Veg Soup = 4 points

2 dinner buns = 2 points

1 tsp margarine = 1 point

1 cheese slice = 1 point

1 slice deli turkey, 1 tsp light miracle whip, 1 tsp mustard = 0 points

1 C mixed blueberries and raspberries = 1 point

1 nectarine = 1 point

1 small slush = 1 point

Total Points Eaten = 18 points

Exercise Points = 6 points

So I still have 2 of my normal daily points left and I earned 6 exercise points so I can eat some of them if I so choose. Which I will probably choose cause I am fairly hungry…I have been waiting all day to eat my serving of Junior Mints, they are like my all time fave candy!, yum! and I can have 40 grams of them (approx 16 pieces) for 3 points which normally doesn’t seem like a good deal but I exercised so I have the points space – and this is why I didn’t lose last week! Me and my wonky logic! lol

Ah well, if my logic lets me eat Junior Mints without feeling guilty, I’ll keep it. 🙂

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Not Epic Fail…But Definite Fail

2 Jun

I don’t know who I am more annoyed at, google map, my gps or myself… I suppose I have to be most annoyed at myself since I relied on the first two but who likes to be annoyed at themself?? 😛

I was all excited to go to Boxerfit class tonight, I was dressed a good 45 minutes before I had to leave and raring to go! How sick is that? Being excited to go have your ass kicked? lol. I think mostly I was excited to earn exercise points so I could eat some sort of treat this evening but hey, least I was wanting to go…

Well, google map said it was a 21 minute drive, ok that’s fine, I left 30 minutes before class started just to be on the safe side. So there was my first mistake, trusting google maps time estimate. Then my stoooopid gps took me quite possibly the worst route to get to the gym so I got stuck in massive traffic, had to take weird loopy roads instead of more direct roads and the route it chose took 45 minutes instead of the 20 google map promised me. Second mistake, trusting the gps to take me the fastest route. The third mistake was believing both pieces of technology would get me where I needed to go in time. sigh.

Guess who missed their Boxerfit class tonight because she was 15 minutes late? Yup. Me. 😦 sadness.

See, with the classes you are given a punch card that gets, well, punched (duh!) everytime you go. The first 20 minutes or so of class are super intense cardio. I didn’t want to use one of the punches on my card when I wasn’t going to get to enjoy (enjoy??) the entire class and miss the main chunk of cardio, it didn’t make sense to me. shrug.

The classes are held at three different gyms, they rotate, and this was my first time going to this location, now I know that next time I hit up this location I have to leave even earlier just in case.

My great plan to exercise at least three times this week has now gone out the window, oops! I hiked on Tuesday and was supposed to Boxerfit today and then tomorrow is Dragon Boating – it seemed like such a perfect plan…ah well, plans change. shrug. 🙂 I might go for a hike tomorrow before Dragon Boating, I love the boating but it really only (only??) works the core and arms and I want more of a full body work out and since I will have the time I might as well hike – this is of course assuming the rain stops cause no matter how much I want to get in shape no way am I hiking in the rain – that’s soooo not my thing. lol.

Today I ate:

29 grams Special K = 2 points

1/2 c 1% milk = 1 point

1/2 bagel = 2.5 points

1/2 tbls whipped peanut butter = 1 point

1 banana = 1 point

1 apple = 1 point

1 pear = 1 point

4 pieces sushi = 2 points ?

2 c Butternut Squash and Red Pepper Soup = 4 points

2 dinner buns = 2 points

1 tsp margarine = 1 point

1 cheese slice = 1 point

1 slice weight watchers fruit pie = 4 points

Total points eaten = 23.5

Ok, yeah, I went over, and I didn’t exercise and I know I shouldn’t go over but I’ve barely used any flex points this week and I really wanted that slice of pie! lol.

If I snack throughout the day (the healthy way) every three hours or so I never get super crazy hungry and am able to make healthy, smart food decisions. But today my timing was off so while I was driving back from my failed attempt at going to Boxerfit class I started feeling hungrier and hungrier, this city is full to overflowing with fast food joints, restaurants and shops. You wouldn’t believe how many places I drove past that had food that I so wanted to stop at cause I felt incredibly hungry and didn’t want to wait until I got home and got something cooked…when I am hungry the wait time for cooking something myself seems unbearably long and torturous. 😦

After I ate my soup and dinner buns for dinner I still felt really hungry, hence my inability to save my slice of pie until tomorrow. shrug. I think though, going over 3.5 points isn’t gonna kill me…and a bunch of the food I ate today was healthy – the fruit, the soup, um, the milk in my cereal? lol. So at least some of my points were used for worthy foods. 🙂

I’m going to go post the recipe for the weight watchers pie on my recipe pages – check it out, it’s super easy to make and way tasty. 😀

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