Archive | September, 2010

Another Monday

20 Sep

The week has begun and so far nothing all that momentous has happened. lol. Come on, give me a break, it’s only monday! I need another day or two before something interesting is going to happen. 😛

I just finished eating a Weight Watchers Banana Nut Muffin, Mmm! It always surprises me when the Weight Watchers food tastes good and yet, over and over I am pleasantly surprised by the tastes I encounter. While I am very happy to be Canadian I do envy people in the states who have access to way more Weight Watchers foods then I do. sigh. There used to be more up here but for some reason WW stopped distributing most of it in Canada, double sigh. I get a wider variety of WW foods when I go to England for heavens sake! We do have some WW stuff, the muffins for example. There are also cookies…little 3 bite cakes (those aren’t so great, too dry)…um, yeah, stuff like that. If you go to actual WW meetings you can buy more stuff (I know this cause my mom goes) but I can’t afford the meetings so I can’t buy the stuff they have at the locations. Whenever I eat the WW snack packs they are ones my mom got me. 😀 Aren’t moms great? lol

What we do have though are Smart Ones and Lean Cuisines – frozen dinners and desserts that have the points pre-calculated and written on the box. Those are pretty good, expensive, but good. I usually have one frozen dinner a week, but I have it for lunch, cause there always seems to be one evening a week where I just don’t feel like making lunch for the next day. shrug. Whatcha gonna do? I’m lazy, lol, that’s what those frozen meals are for!

So far today I have eaten:

29 grams Honey Nut Cheerios = 2 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

1 banana = 2 points

1 Salad = 0 points

mixed raw veggies = 0 points

1 light babybell = 1 point

1 tbls three cheese ranch = 1 point

1 Lean Cuisine Chicken a l’orange = 4 points

1 cup Butternut Squash soup = 2 points

1 Sandwich

    – 2 pieces bread = 2 points

    – .07 kg Fat Free Turkey Breast = 1 point

    – 1 tbls light miracle whip, mustard, tomato, lettuce = 0 points

    – 1 light cheese slice = 1 point

1 weight watchers banana nut muffin = 3 points

That puts me at a total of 22 points – still got 2 more points to go! I know I am always saying I don’t feel like eating all my points but today I really don’t feel like it. I blame SI, a guy at work, he came in to work last week (all last week!) really sick, coughing up lungs, sneezing, basically spreading all kinds of nasty germs around and I think I caught it…not quite as bad as what he had but some form of it. Grr! I hate when people come to work sick! They aren’t doing anybody any good, double grr! Sorry, I will attempt to not rant about it, it’s just we work in a closed air environment, I breathe in those stupid germs and then I get sick cause my immune system sucks…and I am starting to rant, sorry! 🙂

So yeah, to wrap all that up, I don’t feel well. sigh. When I don’t feel well I don’t wanna eat. I know some people when they get sick they eat for comfort, I go the opposite way – I stop eating completely. All day today I ate because it was the time to eat but not because I wanted to eat. I am hoping, by eating my fruits and veggies and protein I will keep my body running at a good level and help my immune system out and maybe this is as bad as I’ll get…it’s worth a shot!

All In One Meal

19 Sep

So I did a bad bad thing; I ate almost all my points in one meal. Oops! lol. It wasn’t even some kind of splurge thing where I decided to save my points so I could eat something really good it was just the day getting away from me and all of a sudden it is dinner time and I haven’t eaten anything.

When I went out to do a bunch of errands I planned on eating right after errand number two – that was Costco. Coscto is like a dream and a nightmare all at once – surrounded by so many things (you should have seen all the Christmas suff!) and yet, who needs to buy 3 jumbo sized boxes of Ziploc bags? Not me, I don’t even have space for them in my kitchen and yet they ended up in my cart, lol. I took them out of the cart before I got to the check out but something about that place, *shakes head*, I always feel like I want to buy so much more then what I really need. The high point of every costco trip is the hot dog…yup, you read that right! I always always always go to the eatery section and buy a hot dog and pop, I mean come on, it’s like $2 and the hot dogs there are sooooooo good! I don’t drink pop anymore but I figured I could still get the hot dog cause I only go there maybe once every 6 months or so and I hadn’t eaten anything yet today. Well, sadness, the eatery section is under construction so no hot dog for me. 😦 The bigger problem with the eatery being closed is that I had a bunch more stuff to do and no chance to get something to eat. sigh.

Luckily I had a little Weight Watchers Pretzel snack bag thing in my purse and a bottle of water with me so that held me over till I got home. The weird thing is that I kept thinking I should be hungry, I mean come on, it was like 6pm before I got home and ate but I didn’t feel hungry at all. I even managed to go grocery shopping and stick only to my list cause I just didn’t care about food. It’s so odd. When I got home I had my whole dinner figured out and I thought by then I’d be practically diving in to it but nope, I think I could have gone without eating at all and I’d of been fine…not healthy, but fine. shrug. If I wasn’t on weight watchers that’s what I would have done – not eat anything I mean. It’s not that big a deal, I used to not eat for an entire day or two I want to say all the time but that’s an exageration, but often. Now it’s ingrained in me I have to eat, even if I am not hungry, so I made myself a high point dinner and ate that and voila! I hit my points exactly. 🙂 Yah! lol

I don’t want to screw up since I had such a good weigh in yesterday…gotta keep on track! It’ll be easier during the week, as much as I am not looking forward to work least I know for the next five days I will be on a more structured eating timeline and that is always helpful.

Today I ate:

1 weight watchers Pretzel Thins = 2 points

2 timbits = 4 points

85 grams Alexia Yam Fries = 3 points

1 Chicken breast (stuffed with broccoli and cheese) = 7 points

1 cup kraft dinner = 6 points

Total points eaten is 22. I also had a corn on the cob and 1 tsp margarine with my dinner but the corn tasted funny. I am not sure how long it is meant to last in the fridge, it’s the last corn on the cob that I bought last weekend (there were four in a pack) and I have been eating them over the course of the week. I only took about two bites of it and decided to not push my luck so I am not counting points from it, shrug, too bad cause I really like it but it so didn’t taste like how it was supposed to! 😛 Speaking of how long food lasts anyone have any ideas about chick peas? I opened the can at some point during the last week…maybe last weekend…I really can’t remember, but I haven’t been eating a lot of them so I still have a bunch in my fridge and I am wondering how long I can keep eating them before they go bad…I hate how quickly so many foods go bad, sigh. I can never seem to eat things quickly enough.

I am still riding the high from having officially reached ten pounds lost so I wore a sweater/wrap thing I own that I haven’t worn in a while. I haven’t worn it for a while cause (1) it’s been summer, duh! and (2) when I bought it it fit nice, then I gained even more weight and it stopped hiding my bulges and started making me look like a big blob. sigh. I thought I’d give it a try today, see how I felt in it and how it looked. It wasn’t bad, it could be better but I was happy with it. It skimmed over me the way it is supposed to which was nice. 🙂 Makes me wonder what else in my closet I can wear now that I had gotten too fat for…guess I’ll just have to treat myself to an evening of trying on my own clothes and seeing how they fit…but not tonight cause the season premiere of Law and Order SVU is on in a half hour and I am gonna be glued to my tv for the duration. 😀

A Perfect 10!

19 Sep

I was scared to step on the scale today – so scared I put it off by an hour. I finally decided to just suck it up, step on the stupid thing and get that part of my day over and done with. All I hoped for was to be the same as last week cause as much as that would suck at least I wouldn’t have gained anymore…I just don’t think I could have dealt with gaining again. Lo and behold the number went down! wOOt! 😀

When I did the math it turns out I have lost exactly ten pounds! Yah! I finally got to the ten pounds lost mark! It only took me how frickin long? Well, ok, that isn’t the point and I will try not to dwell, lol.

Now I have a new fear, what if I screw this up and next week I gain again…there is no margin here, no safety net, I am at exactly ten pounds lost so all it takes is one screw up to lose that accomplishment and be back to having lost under ten pounds and that would suck the big one!

Because it’s the weekend and I slept in I got to eat higher pointed foods cause I had to use my points up in less time then normal, I always love and hate that. lol. It means I get to eat something I normally wouldn’t be able to – like pizza – but it also means that I snack on junk and struggle to eat balanced food groups. Stupid food groups. I think chocolate and ice cream should be food groups! 😛

My other fear is about how many points to eat. This past week I used some flex points and ate I think almost all of my exercise points – that is a lot of food and I struggled with it. I struggled with eating over my points because I was so used to thinking I was only allowed 22 points – the extra food was hard to deal with. Also, now that I know I am eating some flex points I found it harder to resist tempting foods, sounds wacky huh? When I was strict and only ate my 22 points of food everyday I (for the most part) didn’t have too hard a time resisting the bad for me stuff that popped up. If someone brought cupcakes in to work I would look then walk away, no biggy, but now I look and wonder…that wondering is gonna be a problem. Too may foods have opened up to me as potentials and really, all they will turn out to be is potential screw ups, potential pounds on my ass, potential eating binges…nothing good in that kind of potential and now I am surrounded by it. sigh.

I guess I have to learn how to be flexibly strict, lol, I don’t think that is even a real term…but it is now cause I have used it!

Today I ate:

1 piece of Delissio pizza = 5 points

1 banana = 2 points

2 Hershey’s Oh Henry cookies = 3 points

1 bag Fiesta Salad = 6.5 points

2 pieces of bread = 2 points

1 tbls Nutella = 2 points

1 apple = 1 point

1 thinsations Oreo cakesters = 2 points

Puts me at a total of 22.5 points used today. I am still a bit hungry but not gonna eat anything cause it’s late and the only food I can find is higher in points then what I am willing to eat. See? That’s another problem…now that I eat some of my flex points I am all “who cares I am at my points for the day, I feel peckish, eat something”…it’s like an evil voice in my head taunting me with the one thing I really want more of (food) but can’t have.  Grr to the evil voice!

For now though that evil voice can go drown if a vat of McDonald’s cooking oil cause I lost ten whole pounds and the voice can’t take that away from me!

Some days I just don’t care…

17 Sep

I have days when I just can’t bring myself to care – I don’t mean this about only my weight loss, I mean about everything. I don’t care if I make it to work on time, if I eat, if I don’t eat, what I wear, who I see, what I do or don’t do…I just don’t give a damn. I don’t know why I get this way it just happens sometimes, it can last anywhere from a day to weeks, shrug, it’s not fun but oh well, it’s a quirk I guess.

This bout of my not caring started yesterday and extended for most of today; it seems to be lifting a bit – if it hadn’t started to lift I probably wouldn’t be writing this post. When this happens I tend to do what I normally do but less – that doesn’t make sense does it? I know what is expected of me so I do what is expected and no more, actually, usually a lot less. heh I am supposed to eat so I eat at the times I normally eat because if I don’t I will draw attention that I don’t want to have to deal with. I eat but I don’t care what I eat and I don’t care if I do eat as long as people think I am eating, get it? Nothing tastes the same either, it’s all more bland. shrug. It’s not only with food, if I had plans to go to a movie I usually stick with the plans cause to change plans causes more grief then I want to deal with but the movie won’t be as funny to me as it normally would…make sense?

I don’t know why I am trying to explain this, I have never told anybody about this before…oh the odd false sense of freedom writing on a blog gives a person. So I will stop whining about this since I am sure nobody actually cares – hell, it’s about me and I don’t even care. ugh.

Because of this mood I have been in my eating has been odd yesterday and today and yet, I learned something new about me. Normally when this happens I end up binging on some sort of totally unhealthy food, Kraft Dinner, McDonald’s, anything I consider comfort food which naturally ends up being something high fat. *rolls eyes* Well, yesterday after work I had to go to Safeway to grab something and ended up in the aisle with the Kraft Dinner, go figure! Even though I was buying it to over eat I still checked the nutritional info, say wha?? I compared every different kind of KD (I didn’t realize there were so many kinds!) I ended up with the sharp cheddar (which fyi, not as good as the original) because it is only 0.5 grams of fat more then the so called “healthier” versions. I didn’t actually check the points per serving when in the store but I did check it when I got home and was making it. It gets worse! I measured out the stupid stuff so I knew exactly how much I was eating…can you believe it?? I didn’t do it cause I was caring about the points or what I ate but because it’s become a habit and I always follow my habits when in these moods.

So, here I am moody and down and I still counted my points, talk about ingraining a habit in to my daily life.

Today I ate:

1 cup Fibre 1 = 3 points

3/4 cup 1% milk = 1.5 points

1 banana = 2 points

2 triangles light laughing cow cheese = 1 point

mixed raw veggies = 0 points

1/2 cup cottage cheese = 2 points

1 Amy’s Indian Mattar Paneer (frozen dinner) = 6 points

    – it had curried peas and paneer with rice and chana masala

2/3 cup Kraft Dinner = 4 points

5 baby potatoes = 1 point

1 cheese slice = 1 point

1 Jolly Time Kettle Corn pckg = 1 point

That puts me at 22.5 points for the day; I have a Thinsations Oreo Cakesters package sitting beside me that I keep thinking about opening but I don’t actually want it, I just always end my day with chocolate so I keep thinking I should eat it. shrug. I may eat some fruit in a bit cause I am starting to feel peckish but really I am not all that bothered if I do or don’t get a snack. I am trying to use a couple flex points each day so I really should eat something…we’ll see what I get around to.

I know this post was a downer but look at the bright side – tomorrows post is bound to be more cheerful! 😛

Oh. So. Tired…yawn

15 Sep

Alrighty, so I had this great post idea for today but I have been exhausted since I woke up and don’t want to write a long post…I just wanna go to bed, lol, so instead of my great idea I am gonna post an itty bitty post and then go crash. Aaaah, just the idea of sleep makes me grin. 😛 Sleeeeeeeeeeeep!

I posted ages ago about sleep and how it is uber important to get your full nights sleep every night cause if you don’t then your body holds on to its weight…since I learned that I have sorta tried to make sure I always get my sleep but some days I am just so freakin tired that I must not be getting enough. shrug. I am not sure if to compensate for not getting all my sleep I should not be eating as much, ya know, counter-act the body holding on to the weight? I have a feeling that is not the way to go, it would probably compound the entire hold on to the weight thing. sigh.

Have you noticed when you are tired you want to eat more and what you do want to eat is carbs? Ah, carbs, most things that contain carbs are my fave foods…numero uno is bread, sigh. But anyways, when tired your body craves instant energy creating foods so high sugar, high carbs, stuff like that…that is a big fat Danger Zone! Stay away! If you are tired but can’t go sleep eat some fruit – you’ll get your sugar but it’s naturally occuring sugar not processed and your body does better things with it. Or eat some protein…really, just eat something healthy. lol. Veggies wouldn’t kill ya. I did the opposite today, I drank a ton of tea and didn’t eat a lot of food until I got home when I had a nice yummy serving of pasta (carbs!) and some veggies. 🙂

I found I had less resistance to tempting foods today and I am not sure if that was because I was tired or because of knowing I am not restricted to 22 points anymore. There was food offered at work, normally I just say no and it’s not a problem but today I ate half a sandwich, a couple bites of salad, some of my food and I brought home a cookie and ate half (gave the other half to the roomie). That is a lot of food that I don’t have control over and so can’t for sure know how many points it is. Eeek! I’m worried I won’t be able to control as strictly what I eat because of knowing I am going to be eating some flex points and on certain days exercise points.

Today I ate:

1 cup Fiber 1 = 3 points

3/4 cup 1% milk = 1.5 points

1 banana = 2 points

1 serving homemade potato salad = 2 points

1/2 sandwich = 3 points

    – grain bread (2), 1 slice turkey (1), tomato and lettuce

85 grams Catelli whole wheat spaghetti = 5 points

1/4 cup Tomato Alfredo sauce = 2 points

1 corn on the cob = 1 point

1 tsp margarine = 1 point

1/2 cookie = 3 points

That puts me at a total of 23.5 points eaten. Ok, so not a lot of flex points eaten but since I am guesstimating on the points for the sandwich and cookie who knows, maybe I ate more! lol. I had a spoonful of a rice salad and some spinach from a different salad that was topped with 1 walnut (yes, you read that right, I only ate 1), 2 little crumbles of feta cheese (yup, counted that too!) and less then 1 tsp of a vinagarette dressing. I ate such small amounts of those three things that at most combined they would be worth 1 point, shrug, because of the uber small portions I didn’t add them in to my food list cause it seemed a tad ridiculous. But if I want to count them that would put me at 24.5 points so there goes one more flex point, sigh.

Oh well, I am too tired to care I ate some flex points, I am however wanting more food but I am sure that is cause my body thinks it’s gonna be up for a while and it wants to create energy, silly body. lol. Hopefully going to bed nice n early tonight means I will be all alert and energetic tomorrow cause tomorrow is an exercise day and I don’t wanna be half asleep while wielding a sword. lol.

Food Paranoia

14 Sep

So I thought I was over (well, kinda over) my having gained on the weekend until a convo at work where I got to hear about someone else and how they have lost 15 pounds in less time then I have been on weight watchers and blah blah blah. Lemme tell ya the Grrrs were sooo back! Then KB pointed out that the chicky that said she lost all that weight seems to be lying cause she always tell a different story. Phew. That made me feel way better. Well that and her clothes still fit all the same and mine are falling off. teehee 🙂

Isn’t it funny how people decide to lose weight and they immediately start lying about it? People are so weird. There are so many different lies! Some of my fave are: (1) I am never hungry, (2) I never cheat, (3) I love the new foods I am eating, (4) it’s so easy, I should have done this sooner! and (5) I have lost X amount of weight – but the amount lost is always rounded up…why round up? I always say how much I have lost to the first decimal point. I am proud of having lost some weight and I don’t feel the need to round up the amount I have lost…shrug…do you? I mean, if I said a couple weeks ago I had lost ten pounds cause I was almost at the ten pound mark then when I really (if  I ever! sigh) lose ten pounds I won’t be able to celebrate with people cause they will think I already hit that milestone…does that make sense? Maybe that’s just me…

Today I worked really hard on eating more then my daily points; I can’t believe I just wrote that! I have spent all this time learning to eat my 22 points a day – I didn’t want to eat over 22! I have been proud of myself for being able to teach myself to eat my daily points limit but today I threw that out the window and ate my exercise points…it’s causing me some stress. I don’t believe this whole ‘eat your exercise points and you’ll lose weight’  mantra- I know the math makes sense (to others) but my thinking towards food is not logical and is ingrained deeply in to my psyche and going against it is really freakin hard. In my head the less I eat the better so eating 22 points a day is hard because lots of days I don’t want to eat that much; I finally got my head around eating the 22 points and now I have to eat more???

I don’t know how I managed it but I ate my exercise points today, sigh, I noticed though that as soon as I was in to my exercise points I wanted to totally binge. My body seemed to think that since I was eating more then 22 points I could just go on an eating frenzy and it wanted everything! Even now, when I am not hungry and should be perfectly satisfied with my food for today I want more…more, more, more, more, more! Oh, and nothing I want is remotely healthy. lol. I almost ate a chocolate candy that I have, it’s 1 point and even though I had eaten all my exercise points I almost grabbed the candy because my mentality switched from “you have 22 points, eat only those and be strong” to “meh, you’re eating over your points anyways, what’s one more measly point?” This is sooooo Not good! The points were rigid in my head as the line to not cross, now they are flexible and can be moved and I don’t like that, as much as I hate rules for my food I need rules, otherwise I will screw this up.

Today I ate:

1 cup Fiber 1 = 3 points

1 1/2 cup 1% milk = 1.5 points

1 banana = 2 points

50 grams artificial crab = 1 point

1 cup Maple Baked Beans = 4 points

1 piece toast = 1 point

2 triangles Light Laughing Cow cheese = 1 point

1 cup blackberries = 1 point

1 kiwi = 1 point

1/2 cup cottage cheese = 2 points

1 corn on the cob = 1 point

1 tsp marg for the corn = 1 point

1 hamburger patty = 4 points

1 cheese slice = 1 point

1 weight watchers banana nut muffin = 3 points

Exercise points earned = 5 points

Total points eaten 27.5 points – that is 22 daily points, 5 exercise points, 0.5 flex point.

I am embarassed to write that, it seems so wrong to have eaten so much. sigh.  I don’t know if eating my exercise and flex points will get easier or if it will always be this much of a struggle, guess I’ll just have to see how it goes. The one thing I do know is if I don’t have a smaller number on that scale this weekend this whole eating the exercise and flex points thing is going to be under serious threat of ending!

Bad Tartar Sauce, Bad!

13 Sep

You know you have had a condiment for too long when it expired in 2009…that wouldn’t be so bad except I didn’t read the expiry date so I measured out my tartar sauce, spread it on my fish dinner and oh man was it bad. So so bad! Luckily I tasted a little bit on my finger and realized which made me immediatly start scraping it off my fish, lol, and put ketchup on instead. I think I got enough of it off cause it’s been an hour or so and no sickly tummy yet! I think I will just stick with ketchup from now on, it is way less points and hello? Ketchup, yum! 😀

I decided I had to find something good weight/body/self-image wise from the weekend to help balance out the negativity from yesterday – here is what I got…a friend I hadn’t seen in 6 months or so is in the city visiting and we got together for coffee, I had tea. I was wearing a warm hoodie and jeans, nothing all that special, and we sat around talking for a couple hours. When we were done we walked through the mall together till we got to the door I needed to get to my car, we hugged bye and he started feeling up my upper back (get your minds out of the gutter!), he was all “holy crap, you’ve lost a bunch of weight!” – I just kinda shook it off cause I was all depressed about my weight gain on the scale that morning but looking back I should be grateful. Someone who hasn’t seen me in a while didn’t see a difference in my weight but he did notice when hugging me, and that’s kinda cool. 🙂 He wouldn’t have been able to tell from looking anyways cause of the sweater so I am not ticked he couldn’t visually see a difference. Oh, and he whistled at my butt! lol. That was more of a joke but I will take what I can get right now. lol. See, that’s what happens when you have crappy self-esteem, you take what you can get and aren’t picky about it cause you don’t expect to get anything better then that. lol. 😛

So there we go, I am still pissed about the weight gain but I found a positive for the weekend too – balancing things out, ya know?

I had three comments on my ranting post from yesterday and all of them said eating more points is a good thing and will help me lose weight. sigh. I have trouble eating my 22 points a day so I don’t know how I am s’posed to eat even more food, oh dear. The comment showing the math really helped it all make sense, how I am eating 1100 calories a day and if I exercise and earn 4 exercise points and don’t eat them that means I am actually only eating like 700 calories that day and even I know that isn’t good!  I am not eating over my points today, I just can’t do it! It’s already 9:20pm-ish and I am soooo full but tomorrow I will try really really hard to eat some of my exercise points. I think I will take a bigger lunch…that might help…if I can manage to eat it all that is. lol. I have started to eat Fibre 1 cereal which is one point higher from the other cereals I usually eat so that’s good; I will just have to keep looking for healthy foods I can eat that are a tad higher in points. This seems twisted since I have spent all this time finding low point foods to eat but hey, I’ll see what I can do!

Today I ate:

1 cup Fibre 1 = 3 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

1 banana = 2 points

1 Prawn Salad Wrap = 3 points

1/2 cup cottage cheese = 2 points

2 triangles light laughing cow cheese = 1 point

1 cup raspberries = 1 point

1 piece frozen battered fish = 4 points

85 grams yam fries = 3 points

grilled veggies = 0 points

1 thinsations Oreo Cakesters pckg = 2 points

That puts me at 22 points for the day which I used to think was perfect but now I think means I am not eating enough…talk about needing to re-program what I had just finished programming. Oy!

Are you freakin kidding me?!?!?! Arghh!!

12 Sep

I am so pissed off right now, GRRRRRR!!!!!!! I was even madder earlier but decided a post full of swears and threats from me to me would not be entertaining to read so I waited till now, when I am marginally calmer…still grrr-ing tho, grr! 😛

Why am I mad you wonder? Well, let me just spit it out…I gained weight! Gained? GAINED!!!!!!! Arrggghhhh! After not cheating all week and adding in exercise what did I do? I gained, that’s right, my plateau is at week frickin four, 4!!!! This sucks. 😦

It’s enough to make a girl wanna quit and man am I tempted but I don’t have a back up plan, it’s not like I decided if Weight Watchers fails me I will go to Jenny Craig or Herbal Magic or some other program…this is it, all I got and doesn’t that leave me screwed? sigh.

Mom thinks I should eat more, she says now that I am exercising I have to eat more of my exercise points and some of my flex points cause my body is freakin out thinking it’s not gonna get enough food now that it is more active…I am not certain I believe this. I might give it some credibility except I have been plateaued for so long, no way am I putting even more food in to me when all my body is doing is staying the same or gaining, screw that!

I am not sure what I am going to do…I can’t quit the program cause if I do I will just go back to eating how I used to which means all the pounds I did manage to lose will just jump back on to my body but following the program doesn’t seem to be doing me any good these past four weeks…four weeks! That’s ridiculous! I am never gonna get thin at this rate, sigh.

Today I ate:

1 cup Fibre 1 = 3 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

2 pieces toast = 2 points

2 tsp margarine = 2 points

1 tbls raspberry jam = 1 point

1 timbit = 2 points

1/2 Fiesta Salad = 2.5 points

1 corn on the cob = 1 point

1 tsp marg for the corn = 1 point

2 Hershey Oh Henry cookies = 3 points

1 cup 1% milk = 2 points

1 pckg weight watchers Cheddar Twists = 2 points

So there we are, at my 22 points for the day not that it seems to be doing me any good. blarg. I also originally had a cup of soup with the salad and corn for dinner but it was so gross I only had like 3 spoonfuls of it and had to throw it out, ugh. It was Campbell’s Smoky Bacon Clam Chowder soup, I had never seen that flavour before and thought it sounded kinda good…man was I wrong! I really like soup and thought I would try it now in preperation for winter when thick creamy soups are a nice thing to have on a chilly evening but that is one soup that didn’t make the list. Ah well, gotta try new things to find out if you will like them or not. shrug.

Oh, and it seems all this time I was miscalculating the points for the Fiesta salad, oops! The nutritional info says the salad is 2 points for 100 grams and there are 4 servings in the bag, I thought this meant there are 400 grams in the bag at 2 points per serving, my math calculated the entire bag to 8 points and half a bag at 4 points…the math made sense to me. Well, I took a closer look at the bag and there is only like 326 grams in the bag…so 3 and a bit servings…hmm, who decided to do that? Eesh.  This means the entire bag isn’t even 6.5 points, it’s 6 and some random small number of points…uh, crap! How am I gonna calculate that? I have decided to  calculate the entire bag at 6 points and half a bag as 3 points…I figure guesstimating down is ok cause I don’t use all the toppings that come in the bag. There are two dressings provided and I only use one so that’s gotta take some points away, right?

So there we have it, I am still plateaued, no, not even plateaued since that implies I am staying the same, instead I am getting fatter…just frickin great! Some shrinking woman I am! Hopefully tomorrow I am over being so pissed off and my next post is not quite such a downer but for now, this is all I got…sigh…

A Non-Weigh In Day

11 Sep

I was s’posed to weigh in today…it is saturday after all but I didn’t do it. This may not seem fair to you, my readers, since why read my blog and suffer through my mid-week posts and then not get the payoff on saturday when you are s’posed to find out if I went up, down or stayed the same but I have a reason! Two actually…

Reason One: I, like I have done for the past however many weeks now went out friday night and ate much later then normal. I didn’t eat anything too heavy this time around, we went to Brown’s Social House and I got a great fish dish, yum!, but still, bigger dinner then normal and eating later at night then normal skews weigh in day. sigh. I don’t know why I keep doing that, well, except that I have a social life and don’t want to put it completely on hold while losing weight…cause where is the healthy life balance in that?

Reason Two: I am a girl, and like all girls once a month for a couple days I am bloated and crampy and miserable and for me that is today, sigh. Sometimes being a girl can suck! It’s days like this I wish I was a boy…then I think of all those years during puberty where guys are paranoid whenever out in public that they are gonna cop a tent and I am grateful I am a girl. lol. 😀 Since I am all bloated today I know I will weigh more and so I ain’t steppin on that mean ol scale. Grr scale.

I am gonna get on it tomorrow and see what it says and I am a tad scared since it’s been very unfriendly to me these past 3 weeks or so, double sigh. It’s really hard to keep with the program when the scale is not showing the results I was led to expect…hopefully tomorrow isn’t so bad…

I had two swordfighting classes this past week and last weekend I went for a hike so that makes three times in one week I exercised. 🙂 I know I meant to exercise 4 times but it just didn’t happen, shrug, I ended up working late a lot of days and today I wasn’t feeling well so that fourth exercise session never got fit in…maybe I will do better next week. I am already trying to find something to do when swordfighting is done – there is a community centre kinda near me that has a variety of yoga and pilates classes that I am looking in to, the class times don’t look like I will be able to fit them in to my schedule and a lot of the classes are only once a week and I’d prefer something that’s twice a week so I think I will have to keep looking. If anyone has any suggestions for exercise activities to look in to I’d appreciate hearing them…

So for today I spent most of the day doing nothing, lol, I slept in, read a book in bed, had a nap, watched some tv…that about sums up the day. 😛 Pretty awesome, no? I love weekends. 🙂 I was s’posed to do errands and originally thought I’d go for a hike but none of that happened. Ah well, I firmly believe everyone should have one day a week where they do nothing, normally mine is sunday but there’s nothing wrong with it being saturday. I will be out and about tomorrow so I probably won’t have time for a hike but maybe I will fit in a walk or something…we shall see!

Today I ate:

1 whole wheat tortilla = 2 points

1 scrambled egg = 2 points

tomato, orange pepper, onion mixed with egg = 0 point

1 light babybell cheese = 1 point

7 sweet pickles = 1 point

2 Hershey Oh Henry cookies = 3 points

1/2 cup Ben n Jerry’s We Are Waffling Ice Cream = 7 points

1 cup Fibre 1 = 3 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

21 grams Breton Minis = 2 points

Puts me at my daily limit of 22 points. 🙂 It was an odd food day, I didn’t eat anything till around 5pm which is late even for me! After I ate my wrap I realized I was gonna have to eat high point foods the rest of the day or not reach my 22 points – hence the Ben n Jerry ice cream. 😛 I have had that ice cream since 2 days before I started Weight Watchers – you’re probably thinking that’s weird I know how long I have had it but let me explain. I had a bad day at work and stopped at safeway on my way home with the specific intent of getting a really bad for me meal cause I was gonna pig out, I got macaroni and cheese from the deli and some onion rings then I went and got the ice cream, after that I stopped at a liquor store and got something to drink, came home got in to comfy clothes and dived on in!

That is what I used to do when dealing with crappy days. I don’t even remember what made that day so bad…hmmm…ah well, whatever it was I used food therapy to deal with it. That was a friday night, the rest of the weekend wasn’t quite so bad with the food but it wasn’t great then for some reason sunday I randomly decided to start Weight Watchers monday. shrug. That is the beginning of this journey, is it odd I started my “lifestyle change” on a whim? Nah, it’s just my style! lol

When are you fattest?

9 Sep

Weird question right? It is, I know it, but think about it for a minute. When do you feel fattest? Look fattest? I don’t mean when during a week or month – I mean within 1 day. Do you feel better about yourself in the morning, afternoon or night? Does how you feel depend on what you eat that day, or drink? If you exercised or not?

There are a lot of things that can affect how you feel and how your body looks at different times of day and in my opinion that just sucks. 😛

I always look and feel thinner in the morning – I think it’s because  (1) I’ve been sleeping for however many hours and my body has had a chance to do it’s thing without me stuffing food in to it (2) the body re-generates at night so it feels better (3) you shrink during the day and regain that height while sleeping so even though it’s only a small height change it can change how you look – at least a bit and (4) well, I don’t have a 4 lol, but 3 is pretty good. 🙂 Most of my list is a combo of facts from medical science and my impressions of how my body actually works. I have a firm belief that while all those experts out there think they know how everything works when it comes to peoples’ bodies they shouldn’t generalize their rules for everyone cause ya know what, those rules don’t work for everybody!

Oh yeah, I said it, the rules we all try to remember and live by when losing weight don’t always apply! Take milk for instance, it produces acid and irritates most stomach conditions – I have lots of stomach problems but milk always helps my stomach instead of making it feel worse…this goes against the rules. tsk tsk stomach! lol What about ‘exercising gives you more energy and makes you feel better cause of the endorphines’, well, ha-bloody-ha! Days I exercise all I want to do is have a nap or at least get to bed way earlier then normal, I never have more energy, and I am thinking my endorphines are broken cause they never kick in and make me feel better. lol. These are observations I have made over the years, when I actually pay attention to my body.

I think the most important thing is to always pay attention to your body, listen to what it is telling you before you blindly follow what some “expert” says, after all, that expert isn’t living in your body, doesn’t know how it feels and even if you were to tell them words can only really express so much, your words may not properly convey what your body is experiencing and then you’re really gonna be in a bind. Hmm, long ranting sentence there…sorry!

Since starting my “healthy lifestyle” I have tried changing a lot of different habits, I worked on them one at a time to give me a better shot of keeping the new habits but some of these things I am trying to do just aren’t working out so well. The main one is my liquid intake, all the “rules” say drink 8 glasses of liquid per day…everyone knows this rule, it’s so commonly spouted that as soon as someone says they want to lose weight they will be reminded by friends to ‘drink their 8 glasses of water’. I increased my fluid intake over a span of days and even now I still find it easy to forget and not drink the amount I am s’posed to. Couple weeks ago I realized that every night my stomach is more rotound (trying to find a nice way to say it. lol), basically, I was fatter at night. I felt more bloated, was physically rounder and wasn’t feeling great – not that I was feeling sick, I just wan’t feeling up to par, ya know? I struggled with this, didn’t want to blog about it because I thought it meant I was failing, I seemed to be getting fatter instead of thinner and could find no good reason for it. Eventually it came to me, I was retaining way more water then what my body needed and it was settling in my abdomenal area, ugh. I started cutting back a bit on the fluids and bam! back to being, well, not thin at night, but closer to looking like what I look like during the day. 🙂 I think I will always look fatter at night, it’s how my body is, once I get home and I know I can relax cause no one can see me (the roomie doesn’t count, sorry R!) I slouch and my tummy sticks out farther and I become totally comfie. Maybe if I tried keeping my posture and sucking in my gut when I wash up at night and see myself in the mirror I won’t look larger but I think I’d rather have my couple hours where I am totally relaxed and look a bit bigger then be sucking it in all my waking hours and looking that tiny bit thinner. Or is that just crazy? shrug.

I am not saying all the rules are wrong; I just think you should try them out and see what works for your body and what hinders. Eventually you will find a combo that makes you look and feel better. 😀 I am slowly finding my combo, I think it’ll take a while longer to get it down pact but that’s ok, that’s why they call it a “lifestyle change”, cause it takes your whole life to figure it out. lol.

Today I ate:

3/4 cup Almond Special K = 2 points

1/2 cup 1% milk = 1 point

1 banana = 2 points

1 Shrimp and Scallop Pasta Bowl = 6 points

mixed veggies = 0 points

2 triangles Light Laughing Cow cheese = 1 point

2 hot dog weiners = 2 points

2 pieces bread = 2 points

2 cheese slices = 2 points

1 pckg Green Giant Essentials Omega 3 = 2 points

2 Hershey’s Oh Henry cookies = 3 points

Exercise Points Earned = 5

I ate 23 points but since I earned 5 exercise points I didn’t go over my food points in a bad way so it’s all good today! 😀

yum yum veggies

You may have noticed a new food in my list,  it is Green Giant Essentials, a new line of steamed veggies our fave giant has put on the market. They were on sale so I bought some, of course! lol. The first I tried was the Omega-3 it has carrots, cut green beans, zucchini, sugar snap peas and flax seeds with extra virgin olive oil and rosemary and it contains 0.1 g of Omega-6 and 0.5 g of Omega-3 per serving. I did not pick this one because of it’s omega stuff, omega shmega, I bought it cause I liked the list of veggies in it and the entire box is only 2 points! 🙂 I probaly should have just eaten half the box (100 grams) but I was hungry and I figured it was better to eat 1 more point of veggies then 1 more point of chocolate. lol. It was really tasty, and dead easy to make! Pop it in the microwave for 4 mins 30 secs then pour it into a bowl, stir, and there’s your vegg. You can also make it stove top if you don’t want to use your microwave…just sayin. shrug. I would definitly recommend these, be careful though, not all flavours are the same amount of points so check before you assume you know how many points it’s gonna cost ya. Oh, and the flax seed, not so bad…it’s the first time I have tried them and I learned they don’t really have a flavour, shrug, added an odd texture to the veggies but not a bad texture…just different. I think I may look in to sprinkling flax seed on other food items…after all, the “experts” do recommend it! 😛